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Medina Morning



Morning in the Medina dawns
as a chick unfurling itself from a newly hatched egg;
the first small crack runs into the second
and then the third, until the fissures
become an avalanche of noise
and rolling out, the new life that is the new day
opens its mouth and begins its feverish cry

The town wakes up, and brings me willingly with it;
the market square is an ongoing party,
and everyone is invited

Clichés converge like honeybees
on this axis of the world
where I watch a girl write a postcard,
skin pulled tight across her pretty skull
as she smiles to herself,
her able fingers gripping the pen
with the throb of the Taos Hum

earth-pulsing, then dissolving around her

In my pocket, a letter beats like an aching heart
and I grip it hard, as if to pulverise the thing
but just as much, I want to instigate a meeting
with this pale goddess - she

with the red riff raff hair, sparkling ankle bracelets
and bag of shiny purple plums
(which I can already taste and feel
bursting open in my mouth)

But as she moves, I am unmoving –
assuming a position of orientation on a graph;
I am the prime meridian as she devours
the lines of longitude and
I can only imagine the pact we make
as we say our ‘goodbyes’ at four that afternoon
with the sighs of doves surrounding us,
                     and regret hanging heavy as a sheepskin coat


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 





Medina Morning
©crisstiena

Author notes

My word bank:

riff raff
pulverize
purple
fingers
hum
skull
instigate

**The 'Taos Hum' is a low-pitched sound heard in numerous places worldwide, especially in the USA, UK, and northern europe. It is usually heard only in quiet environments, and is often described as sounding like a distant diesel engine. Since it has proven indetectable by microphones or VLF antennae, its source and nature is still a mystery.

The Taos Hum is not apostrophied. The Hum does not 'belong' to the Taos. The Hum is sometimes prefixed with the name of a locality where it has been particularly publicised, for example, the "Bristol Hum" or in this case, the "Taos Hum" (Taos, New Mexico).

http://www.newmexico.org/experience/unusual_unique/taos_hum.php


Image: Lucy. by Lucy@Blogstream.com

In a list

A contest entry

critical reviews welcome, but BE NICE

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • Darkwell
    April 10

    Edit | Reply
    oh wow these words played so well it was like listening to music with pictures forming in my brain, just lovely


  • lunarlunacy
    March 29

    Edit | Reply
    entranced from the get go but upon the following my mouth agaped in stupored awe "where I watch a girl write a postcard,
    skin pulled tight across her pretty skull
    as she smiles to herself,
    her able fingers gripping the pen
    with the throb of the Taos Hum

    earth-pulsing, then dissolving around her"

    you are truly a word artist



  • You've done a great job with the word bank. I know how difficult those can be.
    I love this write.
    Thanks for entering and good luck.


  • DayDreamMuse
    March 5

    Edit | Reply
    Working with a word bank is a challenge and you very well deserve this gold. Having to work with such an amount of different and unrelated words adds a certain magical flare or shimmer so to say to this psychedelic poem. I think I am in a kaleidoscope of images and travel through a very enticing dream...


  • BearWoman gold member
    March 3

    Edit | Reply

    Lovely and Lyrical

    Dang! This is one of the best poems I have read on AP. I love it! Lovely word choices, wonderous flow!!! Punctuation is used sparingly and to good effect. It feels light and sparkling and magical, and yet somehow also practical. A bouyant step that is still anchored to the ground/in reality. I think I shall have to create my own "Bests/Favorites" list ... and I just did. *smile*

    "Clichés converge like honeybees": lol!

    The only thing I would change is to add an apostrophe to "with the throb of the Tao’s Hum" (if you are speaking of the Tao, as from Oriental philosophy).


    • crisstiena
      March 4

      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your lovely comment.

      The Taos Hum is not apostrophied. The Hum does not 'belong' to the Taos. The Hum is sometimes prefixed with the name of a locality where it has been particularly publicised, for example, the "Bristol Hum" or in this case, the "Taos Hum" (Taos, New Mexico).

      http://www.newmexico.org/experience/unusual_unique/taos_hum.php

      • BearWoman gold member
        March 4
        Edit | Reply
        Ah, thank you for the explanation. In that case, would you consider adding that link to your AN, for the folks who don't get around to reading your comment?

  • ... and it may have been an intense meeting, or not - hence the regret at the 'never know'.

    There is delicacy in your style and the presentation of this piece that keep the reader attentive, in tune with desire that is left 'pockted'.

    Excellence in verse. Wonderful to see a gold adornment on this one. Congratulations and thank you so much for sharing your art with The Blue Lamp.

    Loved it. ~Pamela

  • and the ship sails as the moments live on; this is beautiful, provoking emotions and imagery. I want to rescue her, though I know I could do nothing to reunite them. I love the silence amid the noise.


  • Blue Rew silver member
    February 22

    Edit | Reply
    Just an intoxicating read...
    I was there, no way a reader could not be pulled-in,
    breathless witness to the feeling that unfolds~
    to the stillness amidst commotion (life).
    So many symbolic elements I carry from this:
    from red hair, to purple plums to doves and sheep.
    Where one flies free, the other waits for a lead.
    Blue


  • Hetha gold member
    February 19

    Edit | Reply
    What brilliant and beautiful imagery you've woven. I would not have thought that this had a word bank.
    Incredible work and worthy of the gold it took.


  • Ithica silver member
    February 19

    Edit | Reply
    What a wonderful and rich poem... I loved the story and how creatively you used the word bank so that the images just burst off the page... I can hear The Taos Hum-ming...


  • Ryno
    February 16

    Edit | Reply
    You honestly think I have critique? This was wonderful. I LOVED the story, and the imagery - you brought so much new life to old images, like the dove, for example.

    Great work with the word-list... you used each word wonderfully...

    Fantastic theme, and ending too Thanks for the entry.


  • jo-el
    February 2

    Edit | Reply
    you took that word bank and made something special happen. i sincerely hope this is in a book somewhere. or at least will be soon. though, the net does provide probably a much greater degree of exposure, it just seems like something that's to go down in history has to be hard bound lol. from the beginning i'm in awe. but why? i 'm familiar with your work. each word placed perfectly in its stanza. each stanza building perfectly its idea. until the whole shines as a motion picture for my head flooded with details so fun to read ... and wonder how ya got there. i haven't read the others but ya might as well assume the gold is yours. most excellent


  • Night Hope gold member
    February 1

    Edit | Reply

     

    "In my pocket, a letter beats like an aching heart"

    "I want to instigate a meeting
    with this pale goddess"


    I want to sit at your feet & listen to you read this one, my Sister.

    Yeahhh.  That's what I want. Love you, Woman.

  • lunarlunacy
    February 1
    Edit | Reply
    your words just set the mind afire. if i had to pick a snippet from the entirity of that gem it would be the second stanza

    and the line about being the prime meridian as she devours lines of longitude... golden

  • Rowan gold member
    February 1
    Edit | Reply
    No critiques, this is excellent.


  • Phatbassman
    February 1
    Edit | Reply

    ace

    hi. i know nothing really but that's a beauty. really subtle.

1 - 19 of 19