I broke a tooth the other day,
Bit down too hard, it fell away.
Of course, it taught me not to eat
A certain sort of candied sweet.
The type which has a hardened shell
Around a core of chocolate? Well,
I now avow that I will stick
To fruit, with just a little lick
Of nice ice-cream. But that's too cold
For teeth that are becoming old
And sensitive to hail and sun.
A toothache's not a lot of fun
Off to the dentist I will go
To have the thing repaired, just so
That I can chew and chomp again
Without a single touch of pain.
What did you think
Comments
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Excellent
Ah, 'tis a fine write, indeed. Imagery; rhythm and rhyme are just fine. For your next, if ever toothache, here's an old remedy my mother taught we: a whole clove (leaves removed) inserted into cavity takes away the pain. Strangely, enough some tooth ache medications contain cloves. My mother's remedy always worked for me.
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I broke one on a piece of toast recently and it was one that had been fixed only a few months ago. The dentist says I am a heavy chewer and I do enjoy my food! I've been avoiding sticky food for some time. All I have of figs now is the memory.
I like the line about teeth becoming old. You don't mention any neglect in the past, avoiding visits to the dentist, etc. That's part of the trouble for me and now I am paying in several different ways.
I think it's great that you have been able to make a poem about this problem so many people have. I like your rhyming short lines as well.

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your rhyming is impeccable. I loved this
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This is very human and conversational, with lots to commiserate about. I can't help thinking of the improvement in my father-in-law's appearance when he finally got dentures. Your poem also reminds me of Robbie Burns' "Address To The Tooth-Ache".

I counted all your feet, a feat for both of us.

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Thanks M. To be compared to Burns is praise indeed! And I like to have my feet counted as well. The tooth doesn't hurt too badly, by the way. Once bitten, twice shy perhaps? All the best. K.
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I'm sorry it was personal. I happened to meet my dentist that way, and since then it has been much better.
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