Shadow borders

Trying to gauge what is going on,
Why did he or she say that?
Is it because I am gay and they dissaprove?
Or is it just my fault, or something else entirely.

Experience tells me to ignore it,
The barbs, the jibes, the put-downs,
Being talked to like a child instead of a
Middle-aged man.  Maybe I deserve it,
Then again, repeatedly, over and over?

Some tricks have been used so much,
I see them coming and disregard without
effort.  Others sneak up on me - being
Treated well one day, like total crap the next.
Tricks, tricks, tricks.    Seems like the owners of
The world want to make everyone feel like
Such total shit these days.  And for what?

It cannot all be related to my sexuality.
But my intuition tells me, quite a bit is.
All I can do is slog on, no other alternative.
Treated like an imbecile until senile, and then
It will be true.  Not too much further to go.
Sure wish people would mind their own business.