A prayer and pills;
another start to the day.
Looking into the mirror,
several faces greet me –
Why, oh, why, must it be this way?
A ball of whispers grow,
my head becomes crowded.
“Why do you take so many pills?”
A beautiful boy stands before me –
“To keep mommy from getting sick.”
He reads the bottles, pronouncing:
Lexapro, Provigil, Abilify, Topomax,
Lamictal, Xanax….”That’s a bunch!”
The pit grows deeper in my stomach.
Two to bring me up from the dark abyss,
one to keep me from soaring to the clouds,
one to keep those voices from taking over,
one to stop the shaking from the anxiety,
one to stop the craving of my beloved cocaine,
and one to wake me up from taking all of this.
God, to live a life uncontrolled by drugs…
A day without meds brings on acute withdrawal,
blurred vision and nausea as I spiral downward,
with eyes leaking uncleansingly at a rapid pace.
And thank the Lord when my appointment comes,
for once again I think I need a flippin’ adjustment!
Yes, my affliction has mutated again to intolerable.
How I long to be walking with the unafflicted souls,
to feel the sun’s rays against my face and know –
it’s really goodness shining down upon my life.
Though a life on pills is a reminder of my battle,
insanity and lost motherhood are never options.
Author notes
5. http://fcosmin.deviantart.com/art/Drugs-28725878
P a l o s z o o
In a list
A contest entry
- Pills by Angelo di Luce.
450 points, ended January 30, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your thoughts and feelings... by invisible2u.
600 points, ended February 6, 69 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Mixed Emotions by hotchocolate.
700 points, ended February 9, 42 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrite contest ENTER ENTER ENTER by serenity silvermoon.
569 points, ended February 8, 100 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - disabilities and illness by Fay.
550 points, ended July 14, 24 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prompt Series #1 by darkscorpia.
600 points, ended September 21, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Silver dollars and empty lungs (prewrites) by Writing0Freedom.
600 points, ended December 1, 279 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - prewrites contest!!!!!!!!!!!! enter!!!!! by foreveryourslove.
1120 points, ended November 9, 1062 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - 1000 points, 1000 pws by Shadow Anonymised.
1000 points, ended November 23, 1039 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Comments
1 - 36 of 36
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i know it's not original or anything but it's absolutely and without a doubt the truth: this is utterly beautiful. haha i love the imagery and the emotion it conveys. homestly it almost made me cry but im sorta a wuss lol
but ya i loved it. good job! even tho i doubt you need it bc you should know that this is amazing without my say! haha thank you for entering my contest!
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Beautiful, and so true.
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This was absolutely fantastic.
You wrote beautifully and i can absolutely relate to your afflictions.
thank you so much for entering your poem,
and best of luck in the contest.
your a great writer.
Two to bring me up from the dark abyss,
one to keep me from soaring to the clouds,
one to keep those voices from taking over,
one to stop the shaking from the anxiety,
and one to wake me up from taking all of this.
God, to live a life uncontrolled by drugs…
brilliantly said
-Kay -
amazing is all i can say. a beautiful write. thank you for entering.
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I liked this, honesty is really important in life.
I am not ashamed for being on anti depressants, prozac is a common thing in today.
Thank you for entering.
Sophie
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This is beautiful, and it really shows exactly what some people go through. And how hard it is to be controlled by the things that help you. Thank-you for entering this into my contest.
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this sure does show how hard it is to be controlled by the thing that helps you.
i really like the 3rd stanza, where you describe what each pill(s) do for you. -
Thanks for your entry
It's really hard to live a life full of medication to help you get through the day. The reference to seeing many faces was subtle and very effective.
Thank you for entering my contest and good luck
Shari
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great emotions
good work keep it up
kmp -
wow... you really brought this one alive. It is really full of emotion and I can really feel your heart ache through this. Atleast there is an awareness when "you need an adjustment". Thank- you for entering this contest; God Bless.
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Great imagery....the pills remind me a lot of someone. It's sad when doctors prescribe people with so much just to make them shut up.
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i love discription and this was full of it
The Positives:
great job on the imagery and letting us see int o your medicated mind
Room For Improvement:
Nothing I can see you did wonderful
My Favorite Part:
A day without meds brings on acute withdrawal,
blurred vision and nausea as I spiral downward,
with eyes leaking uncleansingly at a rapid pace.
And thank the Lord when my appointment comes,
for once again I think I need a flippin’ adjustment!
Yes, my affliction has mutated again to intolerable
I really loved this part it was very interesting
Overall:
I give this an 9/10 you did great. I hope to see you in my future contests thanks so much for entering.
~*~Apathetic Poison~*~ -
I found this to be too descriptive. Felt there could've been less description and perhaps more visualization with metaphor etc., it seemed stoic and without emotion.
Other than that, a nice poem.
-Nam -
This poem was so simple, yet so full of emotion. The part about the little boy tugged at my heart, and the feeling got more intense when she started to talk about her withdrawal symptoms. Drugs can confuse us, but we always have the strength, in the end, to be our own person, and I loved the last line:
"insanity and lost motherhood are never options."
Beautiful. Simply beautiful.
I wish you the best of luck, and keep writing and improving your poetry. ^__^
Aeris Silverlight
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Very well written poem, you show the reader a little bit of what it's like to walk in your shoes.
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It sure does tell a lot about you and the pain that one endures emotionally.
I liked this part of the poem the most.
'A prayer and pills;
another start to the day.'
which means you've embraced your living no matter how difficult it is. And a prayer at the start of the day to seek God's help. Very touching.
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oh wow this is intense
i like d how you were able to really draw the reader in with the most of the stanzas
like the little boy
made my heart hurt
=[[
this is amazingly written
thank you for sharing with me
<3 -
This was honest, a poem in its simplest yet complex form- a story above all. You are an excellent story teller.
This subject matter, unfortunately, resinates with me, as someone very close to me suffers a similar struggle. You have accomplished the task of making me completely connect, and be engulfed by, your poem. Very good.
All the best, and thanks for entering,
KP -
hm well i do see you've entered alot of contest and thats a bit disheartening but hey whatever. i dont much have anything to crit on this, at first it wasn't really something i'd normally read because it reads off a bit mechanical but i do like the personal feel to this and this line was actually amazing:
"with eyes leaking uncleansingly at a rapid pace"
very nice way of describing uncontrolled crying. i like it.
thank you for entering
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Oh how well I can relate to this poem, as I am sure that many other people can as well. It can be very frustrating, but I guess it's always best if we try to remember the good that those pills can sometimes bring to our lives. I wish you all the best and thanks so much for entering. Blessings, Patty
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I like this, I know how it feels mostly. Only thing I didn'tlike didn't actually involve your words used. It was the font, or more the size of it. Other than that, brilliant write.
Laura -
Why do you take so many pills?”
A beautiful boy stands before me –
“To keep mommy from getting sick.”
He reads the bottles, pronouncing:
Lexapro, Provigil, Abilify, Topomax,
Lamictal, Xanax….”That’s a bunch!”
The pit grows deeper in my stomach
thats my favorite part.
best of luck in my contest. :] -
i take one for deadly headach's one for my stumic to much acid one for borderline depression one for stess one for paranoiya and last but not least i have to take iron pills because i am so mush a nemic its not funny in and out of the hospital at least once a month you did a wonderful job on writing this poem i hope this was not a true story and if it is i hope we can get better as time goes on
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i don't know if it is right to say I love this when it has such a tragic story. You put across the termoil and uncertenty beautifully.
Thank you for entering and good luck! -
such a tragic and saddening poem.
Thanks for your entry. -
How I long to be walking with the unafflicted souls,
to feel the sun’s rays against my face and know –
it’s really goodness shining down upon my life.
Though a life on pills is a reminder of my battle,
insanity and lost motherhood are never options.
A variety of emotions, and a bunch of confusion, hey, I really wonder how you get through it.
Anyways those lines are what I love the most. People have the inability to overcome themselves sometimes, and I'm happy to hear that your story is not one of those.
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Very well written here and I loved it! Lord knows I know what this feels like. Thank you for your entry and good luck
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well writen
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omg, such a heartfelt write, such strong raw emotions shown in this write, a fantastic piece, unfortunately meds can be a necsasary evil, but to live your life controlled by meds is no fun, a great write that i can really relate to.
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thanks for entering my contest, i find your poem very emotional and powerful and although i cant entirely relate I felt you emotion through your words. GOOD LUCK!!!
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Medication can truly be awful, I am sorry that you have to be on it all - at the same time, I am glad that you understand it is needed.
I hope that your journey gets easier. -
Wow, babe, this is absolutly incredible. You describe being on medication down to a tee!
Sometimes tho there is no better option as you have explained here. I know there isnt for me. But we can always hope and dream of one day being strong enough to not need them.
The stanza reguarding the little boy (im prosuming your son) is heart breaking. I understand how difficult it is to explain to a child (anyone for that matter!) why you take this concoction of mind altering substances.
This poem really touched my heart and i could relate to it so well.
Well done sweetie. Yet again an incredible write.
Keep it up, and i look forward to getting to know you better. I feel that we have a really great connection and am so so greatful that we met. take care hun x
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Med are sometimes a necessary evil. As you say in your poem, they are better than the alternative.
Great job.
Mike
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Excellent
Oh my what a powerful write. So very well done. Best of luck in the contest.
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wow...the brutal honesty was amazing...this takes me somewhere else indirectly as my mom's pills were not able to be adjusted enough to help her..as nothing seemed to really help her and so she chose that her life was not worth living almost 16 years ago. .. I only hope for your happiness.
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Thank you so much for this wonderful write, I am sure it will help someone in need
Very well done
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