Something is wrong, I had to insist,
explaining why it is, I should be on the list.
A bookkeeping error has somehow occurred,
for I am a "Christian", you surely have heard.
My place is reserved, I know this because,
I carefully studied what a good "Christian" does.
The Bible I carried was proudly displayed.
I captured the audience with words I prayed.
At spiritual moments, I lifted my hands.
I promoted music from pop "Christian" bands.
I could recite the lyrics of hymns we would sing.
I told everyone "church" is a wonderful thing.
I spoke out the words, professing to be
a "Christian" believer to all would could see.
I listened to sermons, I even took notes.
Just ask me, I'll give you some Biblical quotes.
I was an elder, a leader, looked up to by those,
who sat every Sunday, beside me in rows.
I took all the steps a "Christian" would take.
I made all the moves a "Christian" might make.
I put lots of money in the plate that was passed.
I made an impression that likely will last.
Everyone knows I deserve to pass through,
I did all the things that a "Christian" would do.
After asking again, to take one more look,
they explained to me why I was not in the book.
For, had I known Jesus, that would have sufficed,
but I was a "Christian" who didn't know Christ.
Author notes
Do you really know, or is it for show? A personal relationship with Jesus... that is what get's you on the list. Kevin Pace WordsDoMatter
In a list
A contest entry
- Who would Go? by warrior-eagle.
1000 points, ended March 5, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - THE BIG ONE {shameless} by just rob.
20400 points, ended February 23, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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I loved this poem!
Just about the oldest problem of man (relying on his own righteousness) but you present it in such a thoughtful and artful, yet simple way. Your talent is vast and you use it to the best purpose. I thank God that he chose you to do this work.
If you want a suggestion about the poem itself, I think it's just about perfect. The only thing I would do is use either "elder" or "leader" but not both. They mean nearly the same thing, and I think the line scans better without both words.
Just my humble opinion.
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A wonderful poem....so often we people get caught up in doing what they think is right...but miss having a personal relationship.
Very well done.
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Jaw-Dropping!
Oh my! A hypocrite Christian is a terrible thing!
To walk 'round churches merely playing a game
only to wonder who is "Jesus" person is
condemned to Hell for your "spiritual gifts".
What a waste of a lifetime, a few hours on Earth.
To be rejected by God and the son of divine birth,
is the greatest punishment anyone'd have to suffer.
You have totally captured my attention dear brother. God bless you Kevin!
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Awesome!
What a wonderful story you have told us here. As always, your poetic talents have come out and told us all something we need to listen to. It is all about the relationship we have with Jesus. Those who do it all for show are forgetting one important factor and that is, our hearts are an open book to God and He can read them. He knows what we are all about. Our faith must be relationship-based and not religion-based or we are missing the greatest aspect of it all. This is a wonderful poem my friend. Your friend in Poetry, Mysty Rain
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On the preview underneath the title of this poem on your page, I think the e fell off your 'are'.
I think 'bookkeeping' deserves some kind of hyphen, but that's only because I want one there.
Because and does rhyme in my voice, so that's nice.
'to all would could see.' - is that one of those 'would that it were' kind of sentences? To me, they are very strange.
Oh just a wonderful poem.
I had hoped it would end that way.
Suddenly my sister's husband's whole family have become 'very religious'. As far as I can see, God's got nothing to do with it, and they're so far into the idea that they need to be good Christians that they completely overlook any sense of real faith in anything at all.
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What an awesome write!
The rythm is great, the words flow well but the message is truth.
An all around appreciated poem that you created out of a simple truth that too many have been lost to.
Bravo with a standing ovation
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Nice awareness write to reach the harvest. Blessings.
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Ha
Funny. People like the speaker in your poem helped me lose my religion. Great aint it? Thanks, this poem made me laugh.
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that's not really funny...
I'm glad I made you laugh.... there are those who will think they willl get through (the church is full of hypocrits, but could always use one more)... there are also those who will make their choice for eternity because of someone elses shortcomings. Seems an odd choice for such an important decision... are you sure you want your explaination (of your eternal choice) to be placing the blame on someone else. ... wouldn't you rather make an informed choice based on what you believe, what you have read, what you have discovered? Afterall... when you stand at the gate... you will stand alone, no one to blame, no excuses will change the result... there is only one way. But don't believe me, for I will not stand with you either... go find out for yourself. It is the most important thing you will ever do. I will pray for you (for I can do that). Maybe one day... when we get there (for I believe you will find your "religion") we will laugh together. - Kevin - WordsDoMatter
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Amen to what you shared here! Good message to everyone! THANKS!
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thanks
for the Amen... I can only pray that it makes a difference for someone - Kevin
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very good
Hey Kevin,What is going on in Ezekial in the Bible.
(I'll give you some Biblical quotes) it says.
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wow. that's intense. I love it! good job. It makes you think about people who are good "Christians" but have never experienced real Christianity.
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The visiting of a theme that never goes out of style. Jesus was very clear about the difference in what we do on the outside and the nature of our relationship with Him. I believe poetically you retold the story in a format anyone with any sense can understand and that is foremost in your message I believe. Wish you well in the contest. RC
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Good Effort
Very nice rhymes and well told story. You could make it better by tightening up the meter to make it flow better.
A good write
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