She held her passion
like a rose. Loving the scent,
the blossom -- its beauty
catching her breath
filling her with sighs. But,
she clutched gently, always
aware of how the thorns
would draw blood.
He sought, as a knight seeks
the grail, their release from restraint.
Wanted them to ascend the fiery steps,
where heaven awaited their release
so they could be matched
mated, as a holy pair, full of all
the light that love makes evident
when two bodies are meshed
perfect in the union of their spirits.
Night, a river -- stars, tossed
stones in the stream --
waves created as the energy
flows up and around the fires
color absorbed and cast back
out as light. The moon, a full pearl,
beams down upon the lovers
allows enough light to let them see
the joys they seek in flesh.
Fingers unfold secrets. His,
gracing the origami of her flesh,
lets the mounds of her life giving milk
become rock hard apexes of joy.
Swirling down her abdomen, he unfolds
the blossom of her joys bringing arching
aches to sing along her spine.
She cries out as he tastes the flower’s bud.
She presses back as the fire of ecstasy
floods nerves, increases the sensitivity of skin
brings touch into a revelatory experience.
Letting her tongue teach language to the promise
found in the root of his being and feeling
him rise to the call of passion’s apocalypse,
she begs him to feed the fire’s deep in her well.
He answers, her knight upon his steed
plunging his heart into the quest of their Eden.
They reach beyond the cleansing fire.
They reach into a cloud of light where
their cries belong to another and they
are enmeshed in the other. Passion
provided the energy and their love the course.
Now, peace is a bird they soar upon.
Slowly, the helix of their oneness traces
their descent. They soften, the fires banked,
their cries now whispers of wonder.
Love becomes a kiss and a seed.
Forever is now a still pond on the sea
of their bed. Filled with awe,
they trace each others features
rediscovering the blessing found.
10:25 AM
01/26/09
Alexandria, VA
A contest entry
- The Erotic Quill Challenge - Round 1 by Corvus Corone.
1000 points, ended February 7, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think, what it makes you feel, how you are moved.
Comments
1 - 59 of 59
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Thank you for your entry
Very intricate, a tale penned of seduction and solace. A little long, but well done. Very sweet and romantic and passionate.
Thank you for entering my contest and good luck
Shari
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Aye, I weave a tale to tell and feelings that come and swell and ye know I will not slow the pace until the serving fills the taste buds thick with dreams and all the other creamy waves of sensual madness I spin upon my silky ocean of the night with its soft delights.
Love, Tom B.
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Thank you for your entry and welcome to the Erotic Quill Challenge.
Romance, sensuality, erotic, and passionate images throughout a fine write. Congratulations!
DOM and DLC
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Thank you
Peace & Light,
TomB.
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wow
fanning myself as i tried to find something more to say, and yet
wow says it all
good luck!
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Thank you. A lot of energy in that small word. This is but one kind of passion. For another try, "Support" http://allpoetry.com/poem/5006827
Love, Tom B.
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The moment, the picture, the description. You obviously have a way to keep the sun burning bright for those who think it has faded away. When I was a little child and knew nothing, I couldn't see the passion coming and couldn't see where it might grow. Now I am a man and the fire sometimes fades and withers with the burdens of life. Occassionally I need a reminder of what a moment of youth had brought. You brought that moment. I pray for rain to come when the earth becomes so hard and I lose the romance and the fire of life. When I become so numb because of the burdens that life throws at me I still know there is a quiet place with an earthquake that no one will hear shakes. I wish I still had your passion. Somewhere it faded a long time ago. I read this three times and found it pounded more on me like the bride of Christ than a human experience, and something sensual. Try it from that angle. RC
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There are, in truth, many different kinds of passion. The ways we experience them and take them into the inner spirit are as varied as humans. The ways we express them shudder out of us and push us to our sensitive and creative edge. Often, so quickly and so strongly that we are unaware of this.
I wanted to describe a transcendent passion that takes you out of yourself. I can hear you. My passion? I am fifty-eight.
I have dreams.
Peace and Light,
Tom B.
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I was just blown away!!!
Wow, this write was so amazing!!! I really don't know what to say!!! I just wish I had the skill of the quill as you have!! Well Done!!
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Practice. Read lots of poets. Reread the good ones. Be honest with yourself.
I try to talk about the things I always wanted to know. Like what is she feeling, thinking, experienceing. Does she know how I feel. Really feel what i feel. Everybody thinks they know what sex is, but most don't really know their partners. Hope this helps.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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WOW, time for a cold shower I fear!!!!
This is beautiful Tom and although its difficult to pick out a favourite bit I do love that last stanza, "Forever is now a still pond on the sea of their bed" Awesome my friend, truly awesome and a formidable entry to this contest. Good luck and well done. Val
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Thanks. I try to find images that capture the sensual emotional context in a way that others can swim in. Much appreciated the time you took to create a wonderful review.
Love, Tom B.
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your descriptions of love blend so beautifully with nature and the universe. "She held her passion like a rose" and it only gets more lovely...Love, Lane
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Thanks. I guess making it beautiful damns me to be a romantic. So be it! I love to capture the course of human interactions between loving partners. I love to bring it into it's best possible light. Perhaps, and it is only a hope, this will increase the opportunity for lovers to meet and rise to greatness, instead, of living in their selfishness.
Love,
Tom B.
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This is great, the beauty is wonderful in there reactions... I love it!
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My erotica is more often than not a celebration of the joy found in coming together and honoring each other, the trust of intimacy and the gift of surrender. Thanks for enjoying this so.
Love, Tom B.
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She held
He sought
Fingers unfold
She cries out
Letting her tongue teach language
He answers
They reach
their descent
Filled with awe
they trace each others features
the blessing found.
THIS poem is a prime example of why I love writing erotica.
The emotion is fiery, true,
and not withheld from one another.
Took a long time to get to this point in my writing.
You have to be willing to cross that trust threshold, and just let it spill out.
You've achieved those heights, and didn't dare let the reader down.
Absolutely spectacular.
Love always,
jin
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Like the synopsis
I try to reveal in my erotica. Inner motivations, feelings, sensations, desires so that it becomes immediate and personal. I would like to think you see more about the partner in my erotica than you would know in the encounter.
Love,
Tom B.
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I like how you always manage to write something so beautifully yet so sensual and riveting. Its a difficult thing to do but you pull it off with ease.
Great write it made me smile
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All I do is tell it the way I want to hear it. I want the inner play -- the feelings, the desires. I want the actions and physical attributes given metaphorical vision so that it carries the weight and feel of how it moves me and how, I believe, it moves my partner. I don't know about the "ease" part, but I am glad it looks that way
Love, Tom B.
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Beautifully written.
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Thanks -- Glad you enjoyed.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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This is excellent, erotic yet beautiful and poetic a very tantilising read that i will share with steve later, thanks have a wonderful day
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Thanks, thought you would enjoy this. May your day dance with joy.
Love,
Tom B.
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Nice Work
Effective imagery and diction. As a minimalist, however, I think you can say it better with fewer, stronger verbiage.
Good work either way! -
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Thanks. I write this in a narrative style. At the same time trying to use metaphor and simile to open the reader to larger issues. Yes, I am well aware of the minimalist style and use it at times for thoughts I think it serves. I will let you know immediately when I do
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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Your imagery and wording is amazing. Makes me wish for my own knight...
Thanks for the great read!
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Wonderful compliment. Thank you. May your knight be vulnerable and strong enough to be gentle.
Love, Tom B.
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As long as surrender is mutual then it's just a sigh here C
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Mutual surrender is too often a matter of serendipity as much as desire. It is a gift when it happens. Not a failure when it doesn't. When we are all perfect it will be a different universe.
Love, Tom B.
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true love
No one is perfect except for God.
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The idea behind this is the gift of mutual surrender and the way ecstasy can lift both lovers to a new level of intimacy. Answers? I don't really have any. Paths I have explored is about all I can share.
Love, Tom B.
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sounds like a honeymoon
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Yeah, we create them when we can. Often we need reasons besides our own desire to make it possible.
Love,
Tom B.
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Minwashin
Well its been awhile since you have culled such a tasty treat from the essence of passion, so erotic!
Just heated things up reading this one, I rejoiced!
Your words are enchanting, enticing....in classical
verses of pure love.....l totally enjoyed this read...oh yeah.............minwashin Tom....novy
word means it's beautiful
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Wanted to catch the tension of desire and the want to surcumb to passions gifts and the result if surrender is accomplished. Sounds like for you I did. Thanks for sharing what gifts you received. I could ask for nothing more.
Love,
Tom B.
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as always, your imagery and mastery of language never cease to amaze me. thank you for sharing this fantastically penned piece with me and i wish you the best of luck in this contest that you have entered. viyanna rosemarie
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Glad you enjoyed my senuous attempt at capturing passion. Surrender in making love is so hard for anyone one to achieve. What we seek, we must give.
Love, Tom B.
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This write has a steady, slow pace. It is indeed not what I expected when you said it was hardcore erotica, it is better than what I expected, though I wouldn't call it hardcore erotica. The rhythm, imagery and the language suggest almost an introspection, as if the narrator is observing their ouwn reactions to the act of love making, as opposed to being engaged in it. I still enjoyed this quite a bit, especially all the movement in this write. I think that is what I love most about your writing, the sense of constant, slow movement.
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Yes, I do take the position of observer in this write. I allowed me more time and space to comment in a sense with metaphor and simile. I was being fecicious (sp?) about it being hardcore. Sensual yes. Wanted the passion to dance into the heart and soul of the reader so I took my time to ease it in. Didn't want them to grasp the thorns
Love, Tom B
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a wonderfull sensual and passionate write that turns into a hot and steamy delight, full of erotic teasing that is a delight to read. good luck in the contest with this great write.
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Thanks. I appreciate the compliment.
Love, Tom B.
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Tom hun your killing me with these long writes.. I just can't follow them after a wile.. I must say tho it was super hot, steamy, and sexy.. I loved it... Good luck with the contest!! Amazing as always!!
~*Cristy*~ -
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I will create a few short ones in the near future. I have one more long one I have to do for Blue Rew's contest. Glad you enjoyed. Now the question is, if the sex takes too long do you fall asleep
Couldn't help the tease.
Love, Tom B. -
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Hey if the guy can't keep my attion then why is he even bothering... my Husband does really well tho.. from time to time he is still young.. he has alot to learn!!!
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Keep him practicing. It helps
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See there is where i have a problem.. why should the lady keep the guy parcticing lol hehe
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Hot...passionate...steamy, and uniquely
"satisfying" (pun intended)
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Glad to hear I didn't let you down. I wanted to capture the sense of release that comes from true surrender by both people.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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This is very very emotional and beautiful! Fantastic Job
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Thank you. I wanted to capture a beautiful moment.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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Darn...
It's hard to find words behind this...right now I'm finding it difficult to swallow, larynx paralyzed, speech is slow motion, pupils are still...are you satisfied Tom (can't move legs-smile).
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Preformed one of my erotic poems in a club in NE DC once. Got a similar reaction. You are not alone. I like to take my erotica outside the normal level. Woman seem to appreciate it more than men.
Love,
Tom B.
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I thought it peaked with the rose and thorns metaphor in the first stanza and then kind of fizzled out after that.
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Can't please everybody. Glad you enjoyed the opening metaphor.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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Yikes!!! Are ya "trying" to make my old laptop seize for it's final meltdown? This one sizzles with lusty imagery... Naughty, naughty...
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If I am going to speak of passion, I would hope so. Truthfully, I hope it rose above naughty for you and spoke of the magic that full, open passion can bring. Thanks for stopping by.
Love, Tom B.
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wow
Wonderful flow of words, very long and beatiful. I got to remember to read this when hes home in the evening. (lol)It was a pleasure to read your work.
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I wanted to focus on the fear of passion and then the result possible in its release. I hope I captured this to some extent. I enjoy being able to take the exploration of sex to a sensual, spritual level without losing a sense of the magic involved. Thanks for the read and review.
Love,
Tom B.
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