The Black Ectoplasm

It’s January 25th, 2009
it’s just another day
another day of remorse
another day of guilt
another day of tears
another day
of looking
at her pictures
recreating the scenario
of the night she left
the world by choice
my eyes,
blurry with tear drops
glaze over
only to catch a glimpse
of a black ectoplasm
I wipe my tears away
to clear my vision
it’s now expanding
in the middle of my room
right before my eyes
this indescribable form
what is this?
curious, I inch in
buzzing white noise
overcome my earshot
my shaking hand
slowly greets the substance
Tingling sensations take over
overwhelmed with curiosity,
I get up and walk through
only to find myself instantly
consumed in a strange surrounding
of overwhelming flashing colors
and excruciating buzzing noises
all around me
over me, under me
I’m floating in what seemed to be
a different dimension
now I’m falling
I’m back on my bed
In my room
I search for the ectoplasm,
but it’s gone
puzzled, I lay my head
back on my pillow
trying to make sense
of my strange experience
i shake my head and shrug it off
it must have been a crazy dream

once again she comes back
into my mind
I log on to look at her online memorial
but it’s missing
sophia must have deleted it
but why?
i reach over and dial sophia’s number

“why did you delete Ghazal’s memorial?”

“what are you talking about? What memorial?”

“why are you being like this? can you tell me what’s going on?”

“honey I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

and that’s when it hit me-
the strange ectoplasm,
the white noise,
the flashing colors,
the floating,
her missing memorial-

could it be?
could this really be happening?
is this even possible?

“hello?”

“yes I’m here. . .Sophia, what day is it?”

“it’s the 14th.”

“I have to go-“

I double checked the date
on my computer
and surely enough,
it was January 14th .
skeptical yet hopeful,
I immediately dial Ghazal’s number
Ring ring, ring ring, ring-

“Gisselle!” her sweet voice rings

And my heart stops
I nearly drop the phone
tears of bliss take over my face
this moment. . .
is beyond my understanding
but it’s happening
and it’s real

“Ghazal. .where are you? I’m coming right now,
I need to see you”

“What’s going on? Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not okay, I need to come see you right now,
I need you more than ever”

“Okay hun I’ll be at my house”

I run to the window and find
my father’s car sitting outside,
Waiting for me
I grab his keys and sprint out the door
What seemed like 10 seconds later,
I’m banging on her door
mind racing
heart racing
hands sweating
Pit pat pit pat
The door opens
I nearly topple her down
Her scent my aromatherapy
Her warmth my blanket
I cup her face in my hands
and stare into
her lively eyes
admiring her beauty
her puzzled expression softens
and her luscious lips turn into a lovely smile
I can’t hold it in
i meet her lips with mine
my entire mind and body
struck with ecstasy
as I kiss the angel’s lips
my hands exploring
her warm body
grabbing her close to me
“I’m sleeping over,
I'm not leaving your side”
I tell her.
we lay on her bed
I hold her tightly
And gaze at her
finally whispering to her
something virgin to her ears

“by the way. . .I love you, too. ..”

her eyes well up
her hands reach
around me
and pulls my face
towards her
sweet , delectable kisses
we enjoy each other’s
blissful embrace
but suddenly
her temperature drops
her skin is freezing
her grip loosens
ice cold blood
paints her body
we’re not longer in her bed
but in an enclosed box
10 feet under earth
holding onto her corpse
the buzzing returns
excruciating
electrical current
pulses through my veins
she dissipates from my arms
and I’m alone in my bed
It’s January 20, 2009
it’s just another day
another day of remorse
another day of guilt
another day of tears
just another fucked up day.