about my hill--
where the moon shone
on the white bridge
below
and the deer
heard our heel--
branches grabbed our toes
where the red fox had tiny cubs
clumsy as our tripping feet
in spring
where trees were climbed
with the red faces
of a hundred years
of oak
and burnt stones
followed points of gold
that fell into
the jingling
pocket of youthful
treasure
where we yelled "war"!
with bombs of monkey apples--
bullets of earth
and swung freely the limbs
of green sail and mast--
fore and aft--
in surprise
of shrub-fitted hats
where in daylight
we would knee up
thorn creek--
twisted as any branch--
to feel the fish
slip through our legs
like fiery eels
where in late fall
we claimed scores
of the freshest mold
of rudd and scrape
though, we never pulled
a hungry glove
or did mend a wild eye
and the fawn lay
in the tall grass--
beneath us
where in winter
we would skate the devil
up and back
up and back, again--
our ancient thorn creek,
twisted as any branch--
till the last blade of winter
met the fresh run of spring
about my hill--
where the moon shone
on the white bridge
below
Author notes
about my hill. by kevin o'connor/ui'connabhair
A contest entry
- Should you be on my favorites? by unraveled.
700 points, ended March 15, 52 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - POETRY PODCAST - Showcasing your work. by Thom Boulton.
700 points, ended April 1, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your oldest prewrite poems and my 20th contest by stargazer..
650 points, ended April 20, 417 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - zeniths by dewfall.
1800 points, ended May 4, 15 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Time by Palas Kumar Ray.
900 points, ended August 16, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me your very best!!!! Tons of points! by God is my reality.
1450 points, ended November 24, 258 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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very good
nostalgic write of a time gone by. very good imagery
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lovely poem, beautiful images, enchantin
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Nice poem.Beautiful imagery of past days.The elevation has been very indicative of different stages of life. Best of luck in my contest "Time".
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that was good journey with your words through all seasons with human emotions...
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this is beautiful... i would like to read more by you in the future. your tone is very mature and thoughtful, something i would like to work on. i particularly liked the image about the fish and fiery eels, that was great!
thank you for entering,
-cassidy
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Beautiful, beautiful imagery.
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yes.
Your imagery was very interesting. I can't to read more from you!
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Yes.
I enjoyed this very much
-
Yes
I loved the natural imagery here, feels like home to me. And I found your repetitions effective, which is unusual -- usually I don't find them effective. Anyway, I think you'll do well in the contest.
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Shaking
this poem should be sent to all the warlords in the world......pls someone tell them to stop the menace and have peace in the world
where in late fall
we claimed scores
of the freshest mold
of rudd and scrape
though, we never pulled
a hungry glove
or did mend a wild eye
and the fawn lay
in the tall grass--
beneath us
these lines are very pure nd thoughtful......loved it
-
I like it It makes oyu think aotu the inside meaning... very in depth... congrats it was very superb!!
-
A very beautiful write. This seems to be every human memory of childhood in a special place. Great writing.
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Oh!! I believe this is my favorite write form you!!! such imagery!! I truly loved it! you really did such a wonderful job! the story that you weaved here was really lovely.. you did such a wonderful job hun!! thanks much for sharing!!
Angel
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