echos
rattling down
mirrored black corridors
to shatter old cobwebs before
a sharp twisting reflective ricochet
rebounding wave-forms merge into
eidolon silhouettes
made of fractal
echos
Author notes
Rictameters are fun. Good for ideas that want to express themselves more briefly. It starts and ends with the same two-syllable word. Then it goes 4-6-8-10-8-6-4.
Evil angels are the best kind. My username is intoothandclaw.
A contest entry
- Rictameters by piccola.
900 points, ended January 25, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Forms/Dirty Pretty by the evil angel.
400 points, ended May 10, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
reflective ricochet/ rebounding - That's wonderful.
Not an easy form but fun to play with. Buff
-
I always have a difficulty with the syllables. I pull through for haikus and tankas and senryus because... well, quite frankly because they're japanese and I am obsessed with Japan. But other than that, I've never really been a fan of short poetry so that'd most likely be a no on this form for me. I don't think I could work on it as much as I would like to. BUT it is quite clear that you can work with short poems and with rictameter forms. This is wonderful. Such power in so little words, and that is quite a feat. A feat I don't think I could accomplish. So I applaud you. Thank you for showing me this form, although I'm not going to be looking into it.
-
AP name? Please? Like I asked?
Will comment on the actual poem later.
-
-
argh. Sorry. I'm very absent-minded lately. I keep doing edits and forgetting stuff.
And see? I do so use forms.
-
-
I like the use of the word eidolon ... rich use of vocabulary
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
