Preston was a single man
lonely but content.
He was an accountant
in a tall building...
87 floors to be precise
He wore stiff grey suits
with his greasy black hair,
and round glasses
perched on his nose.
that over magnified his eyes
After too many days
condemned to cubicle isolation,
a gorgeous young woman
appeared in his office.
With some heavy duty debt
After not one but three
after-hours consultations
Preston had cleaned up
all 50 of her credit cards
In thanks she took him out on the town
As Preston had hoped
their outing went just fine
and soon Ms. Venus
was more than just clientele...
Oh la la Mr. Accountant...
From credit cards
to crazy kisses
Preston went from single
to newly taken
Secretly he wished to be her Ares
~Ring- Question- YES!~
Another successful day at the office....
Author notes
I FIXED IT!!!! YAY!!!!!!
The name Preston to me is some boring accountant so that's who I wrote about
Reminds me of the movie Hitch -with Will Smith 
**** The mythological reference to those hwo weren't forced to learn it in grade 9 english***
Venus ( Aphrodite ) The goddess of love had a lover named Ares. She was actually married to Hephaestus but he was ugly... and she moved on . She later had more lovers- that was just how the gods worked...
Hope you liked it!
In a list
A contest entry
- Create a story by Valley Girl.
400 points, ended February 2, 2009, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please judge as critically as you want
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Thanks for your entry. I would agree that the flow was off in some parts, but I still got the jifts of it. I think that it is very cute. Lol, I can picture the guy from the Hitch movie lol. Very fitting! Best of luck in the contest.
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Scrap that.. I actually rewrote it. Please judge the better version
thanks. I can't live with something that's not my best. It goes against my morals. I, Nakatrea solemnly pledge to never sacrifice flow for rhyme as it is unnecessary and annoying. -
actually the flow is awful and I should have done better..
its definitely on my re-write list. -
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Much better! The other one seemed to have force rhyming. I like the new setup for this. Thanks for your entry once again.
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Oh god I know.. it was dreadful but i fixed it and am much happier
GOSHERS no more rhyming EVER! ick just say no.........
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Your name is Preston.
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this will be interesting.... hmmmm ok this might work
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