If I should finger ivory strokes
along this birch,
descending,
and note how moonlight makes their lingering hue
dissolve together with tree bark,
could you, in distant meadow,
lay your cheek upon a kindred, pallid trunk
and feel me
touch you
beneath the peeling cover?
When dusk's revealing breezes rustle treetops
and moonbeams transfigure flitting shadows
there upon your pensive ground,
if your footstep bruised a fallen limb,
would you startle at its night-cry
and turn to look for me?
Have you not tasted me at twilight
when leaves reached to brush your passing lips
and untamed twigs left their signs
upon your face?
There is remembrance in past communion;
union, in common passions.
And though I may not know your arms' surrounding sanctuary
nor let you feel my promise upon your skin,
there will ever be moonlight
and we will always have birches.
In a list
- Ink Angels - Pending Additions • next in list
- 3-Bronzes • next in list
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- Searchings • next in list
- ~ Their Writing ... My Reverence ~ • next in list
A contest entry
- Valentine's! ....My Favorite Day by poet2angels.
700 points, ended February 2, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Best Four in a Series by ea.
400 points, ended August 3, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 41 of 41
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I love this. You transported me right into the scene of the forest. The stanza
"Have you not tasted me at twilight
when leaves reached to brush your passing lips
and untamed twigs left their signs
upon your face?"
Was so good I had to read it three times before going on. You have great mastery of words.
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Birches huh?
I just don't know what to say.....
"nor let you feel my promise upon your skin"
Makes me ache.......
Blessings,
~
~ Janet ~ ~
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Your poem here is ..simply put.. one of the most beautiful I have read. It took my breath away.I forgot how amazingly some people wrote on here. I forget a lot lately since I am not around often. Anyways. I love your play with sensual, passionate, nature! I think you could not have written this better if you tried and congrats on that bronze trophy!
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nicely done, indeed.
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Wow... You have a voice for imagery.. Suble passion that tastes of fine cotton and old pine... This is so lovely.. Great work of art ... A painting hung and admired .. Destined to be among the great... Beautiful poem poet!
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PS - my favourite lines, posted here with admiration and adoration for their uniqueness and beauty - the imagery struck me like a sky-fallen blow from Thor's Hammer
"if your footstep bruised a fallen limb,
would you startle at its night-cry
and turn to look for me?" -
Trees across Earth bow to you for presenting them in so many dimensions, with your wonderful words. I love how there is so much diverse content in your poetry - sorrow, joy, thoughtfulness, questioning, beauty, gloom ... a million threads you stitch into a tapestry every time. And of course the trees are grateful you don't cut them down to put your pen-marks in books, but rather on these electronic pages I couldn't wish to suggest a thing be changed with this, and am bookmarking it to return to and read on future occasions. What a magnificent piece this is! Coincidentally, I feature a birch in my most recent piece, Rapture. Then I come here and find you've written a poem on them
Wonderful poetry, leaving no room for dispute or doubt. I am now to pay out points to give this the applause it deserves!
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Thanks so much, Stuart. These are awfully kind words. This is one of my all time favorites, so I am so glad to see someone else enjoy it. I am off to check out your Birch poem!
Thanks again!
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This is a work of beauty baring shoulder branches bare, through woodland kiss...such bliss for Nature feeling foal
in printed meadow of evergreen thought
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I'm a little late to this one, but I agree with the millions below that you have created something very special here, all written, spoken and felt with the depth and touch of a true artist. Your last lines resonate in their poignancy. Have three more clappies (like you need 'em) and bring on the Monkey Puzzle. K
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very beautiful...your birch poem made me pine. loved it.
~ Nicolette
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very beautiful imagery
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Oh, I can definitely see why this is used as an example for Cannonsfire's contest...
exceptional.
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One of the most beautiful writes...I've ever read - A masterpiece. Truly.
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So very eloquant and outstanding. each line
wraps the reader up in beauty.
Sesational!
Delila
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Here she is standing alone waiting to be read in all her glory
This is my favorite poem of yours I've read her many times.
With all honesty it makes me tear up abit
Thank you for writing this special piece
Tony -
Very thought provoking. It was truly beautiful. It had both longing and acceptance in the poem and the imagery was absolutely wonderful I got lost in it. Thank you for sharing.
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This was amazingly beautiful in both its longing and its acceptance. I loved the imagry you wove into this. I can easily picture this in my mind as I read the words. Your ending is what made this a winner in my book. Congratulations on the trophy
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So deserving of trophy. Lovely flow and movement. Love - Have you not tasted me at twilight- you metphor for love and relationship that entertwine with a powerful joining of passions. This is more than emotions in the dark as if lifting shadows to embrace.
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wow just wow this is a stunning write dear poet and the imagery is vivid a classic
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Wow
This one just rolls off the toung and fills the mind with pictures of standing in a forest as the sun is trying to break through that wall of trees.
Neat.
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nice imagery!
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this is beautiful...I love the birch, and how you've peeled its layers into this lovely poem. Breath-taking.
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this is absolutely smooth and beautiful ..
Lovely write
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What a wistful, lovely memory this poem invokes. I thought of the line, "We'll always have Paris."
The intricate, yet deeply meaningful line, "There is remembrance in past communion;
union, in common passions" showcases your wonderful ability to manipulate language yet never lose sight of the emotional impact....truly a gift.
No one is better able to blend the beauty of nature with the longings of the human heart, to find sacred symbolism in a tree branch and gentle pain in moonbeams.
This is an unusual but deeply satisfying Valentine. Thanks for sharing with us humble mortals. Peace and hugs, Liz
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The poem shifts into a new focus towards the end. Reading, it seemed to be a poem simply about those deep connections we wish to romantically claim are there...that we look at the same moon, feel the same pangs, feel that touch on bark as a melding, or a caress on the cheek.
The poem however shifts (as you know, but I point out because I see it, lol)
"Have you not tasted me at twilight
when leaves reached to brush your passing lips"
Here becomes not eciprocal but a hope of reciprocity.
"There is remembrance in past communion;"
But no suggestion that it is now shared.
"And though I may not know your arms' surrounding sanctuary
nor let you feel my promise upon your skin,"
It is a hope that it is reciprocal (if I type that word again, please shoot me, lol) maybe even an assumption, but that is different from a pledge from both that such is happening.
That makes it a sad poem, and that last line intensifies the sadness. That is why I would not call this a romance (for it doesn't necessarily conform to the idea of that word I can't say again or you'll shoot me as instructed)
It's beautiful, but with a longing to it, one any romantic (even a few cynics like me) can read and place ourselves into...under the moon, near the white birch (I decided it was a white not a yellow or other, because I am Yem, lol) remembering a love, hoping in some way they are too looking up at the moon.
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Astounding
and resounding in the beauty of poetic voice! wow, a masterpiece of writing..bravo poetess!
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I could just leave a big cheezy sigh all over the page, but truly this is worthy of it. The resonance and soft lilt and emotion in this is truly beautiful C
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Brilliance...
I love the imagery you have crafted within this piece of poetry.It's beautiful and filled with loving thought, and images that dazzle the mind.
Thank you for sharing your poetic genius.
Be blessed in all you ever do.
Tony
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This is a simply breathtaking write...
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The moon simply fascinates me, and I can't get tired of reading and writing about it. Your poem has a wonderful imagery of romance, and nothing better then romance under moonlight.
Beautiful poetry Ten
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You can dance to this.
Imagery, balance, delicate layering. It's so rich read aloud. I think I'll read it again.
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I could in kindred Aspen, quiver,
when leaf turns tired of summer rain
in hope of golden dance from one last sacred shimmer...
such a beautiful weave of feather...
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This is exquisite...
I am a huge fan of nature intertwined with love (when done well) and this is excellent!
It sweeps one away from beginning to end leaving a sigh to linger in the mind....This is one to cherish!
Lynda
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This is one of the most beautiful pieces I've read in weeks. Love, Lane
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Beautiful thoughts of connection in the contemplative moonlight hours. Outstanding "lay your cheek upon a kindred, pallid trun and feel me touch you beneath the peeling cover." Excellent imagery, and appealing premise of communicating through nature and similarly inclined thoughts.
Outstanding "though I may not know your arms' surrounding sactuary...there will ever be moonlight, and we will always have birches."
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the eyes, the touch, the familiar, remembrances
wonderful use of senses and the world and its beauty can truly bring a common experience and understanding...lovely poetry... PK
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Oh my, this is so beautiful. My heart sighes when I read this.
Truly a poem of love by a master of the pen.
Gaylene
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Thanks so much, gal. It's always nice to hear when something touches another's heart. This was a real feeler for me, so I'm glad it comes across to others too. Thanks so much for the encouragement.
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thank you Ten
omg.
first off, i love birches. they are my favortite tree, my street has the word Birch in it and birches...that's why i bought my house here...
and the only thing i don't like about this poem is that i wish it was written by a male. lmao
i soooooo felt you speaking to the reader in this poem. sigh. and i love when a poem speaks like this, directly to the reader..and draws me into it..
i love this, this is a beautiful poem, and the kind of love poetry i always aspire to write, but never do. lol.
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Gorgeous bug, just gorgeous and a sigh if ever I heard one C
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