In the lap of nature
peace serenades,
this green beauty
hushes a hectic mind
But man’s greediness
rapes her splendor,
as callous machines
eat away her body
Buildings replace her
for man to embrace…
A contest entry
- Stream of consciousness by brandy..
550 points, ended February 21, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Woot woot
STOP GLOBAL WARMING. lol That's the first thing i though of when i read this. But on a more serious note, i thought this was perfect. It just flowed so easily. It was so simply said about such a deep and serious topic. Really really great poem. Keep on writing. -
I love the way you described this. Describing nature's beauty and then the way you describe man destroying such beauty.
Great word choice and passion.
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Very nice poetic effects.
You slowly slid into a harsher tone starting with the end of the first stanza then indulged in the hard words in the second stanza. The poem itself has literally gotten rid of nature by ending with a 'triumphant' industrialized world.
Nice job =) -
Omg !! i abosolutely love this. I had to read it twice to get the full effect of the poem but i think that now i have read it twice that i understand exactly what your talking about. And i like the metaphors you used as well. They make the poem very striking.
Favorite lines:
"Buildings replace her
for man to embrace…"
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This was a beautiful poem, and I agree that a man's greed can be devastating to nature's beauty. I really liked this one.
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