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Six Shades of Citrus

 

 

 

 

 

Martyred and thrown like lost fruit to the sea

'mid swallow and wave, where angels did weep,

as pith and purpose pealed pride...to fall free--

to bed of all dead, for stone tomb to keep.

Dry gaps gathered grief between long parades

as segments of space tied saints round soft skin;

Clement claimed coffin of six citrus shades,

while tides parted wide to let mourners in.

Solstitial strengths squeezed edible ends,

whilst evergreen echoes sought anvil's arms

and juniper joys found fragrancy's friends...

near anchor of peace...'neath wings without harms.

     Zest buried beliefs beneath roots of trees,

     as saints supped on solace...under soaked seas.

 

 

 

 

 

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • sgking123
    September 9

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    remarkably done

    this was terrific and super... some lines took m breath away....whilst evergreen echoes sought anvil's arms....what imagery and sequencing...a damn good read this was. Good that I chanced upon it while ambling. Thanks fors ahring.I have a few fresh ones on my page if you wuold care to visit

  • 21.86 / 25

    My dear, this is so beautiful. Your imagery and the symmetry of everything just rolls off my tongue perfectly!


  • Griswold gold member
    August 4

    Edit | Reply
    A wonderfully flowing and alliterated sonnet. I'm suddenly craving Sunny Delight. Thank you so much for entering and best of luck to you in the contest... Scott


  • Hetha gold member
    July 9

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    I'm glad I came back to read this again after so long. It has retained it's freshness and zest. Still beautiful in its' lovely imagery, texture, feelings, and sound.

    ~Hettie


  • Tirrell
    February 26

    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful sonnet, I am strangly in want of an orange now. Love the imagery, and love how it comingles with metaphore, a striking read!


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    January 31

    Edit | Reply
    I'm back!

    Anyone who knows your "voice" will have come across your love of alliteration before. Sometimes it leads to very strange, startling choices of words; sometimes the sense of them is secondary to their sound. It makes you one of the more interesting poets on AP. Doubly interesting here that you have used your voice to "speak" a sonnet.

  • Vera Rich
    January 26

    Edit | Reply
    Many of the lines in this poem suggest that you were trying to replicate Old English alliterative patterns. If so, I have to tell youthat you need to reread the rules somewhat.. (In particular, there should be one or two alliterating workds in the first half line and only one in the second). But even with the mistakes it is splendid to see someone trying to use this technique. Or did it simply happen by accodent. If so, it is a most remarkable and splendd accident!!!

    • Laura Lamarca gold member
      January 26
      Edit | Reply
      It was purely by accident...I am a fan of poetic device, particularly alliteration and when used properly, not only does it enrich the content of a poem, it also helps with the overall flow and emphasis. Thank you for your comment.

      Laura

  • Mairi bheag gold member
    January 23
    Edit | Reply
    (Sorry about commenting before the judging - I visited the poem before I had even thought about composing an entry myself)

  • Thor-201
    January 20
    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully expressed, with wonderful alliteration. Best of luck in the contest.


  • Age of Rain
    January 20

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    You are (which you most likely already know) a master of alliteration.

    'as pith and purpose pealed pride...to fall free--'

    that line was an incredible display of it for sure. An excellent poem.


  • Swangrnv gold member
    January 20
    Edit | Reply

    wow

    awesome! a metaphorical masterpiece(in my opinion) loved this my friend..


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    January 20
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    You really threw yourself at this one, La!


  • Hetha gold member
    January 20
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    Vividly colorful imagery and texture you paint here. Love it! Well written.

    ~Hettie

  • luvdrkchocolate
    January 20

    Edit | Reply
    Oh. This is a nice little poem that you have penned in here. I loved the title of this and that's what made me want to click on it. I guess because I missing the summer and the fresh fruit. You're poem was pretty neat because it had a lot of positive and vivid images. It made me feel a little warmer just by reading it. You've done a good job of expressing yourself here.


  • Nom de Plume
    January 20

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    Rolls of the tongue wonderfully. good luck in your contest


  • arafura gold member
    January 20

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    The bells of St Clements... very good work. I enjoyed reading it very much and it was a great interpretation of the prompt!


  • masterblaster gold member
    January 20
    Edit | Reply
    Hi, a beautiful poem, regards Di

1 - 19 of 19