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Rainy Saturday

The rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
my cat,
a black shadow
yawns,
stretches
and curls up
on the couch
happy to be inside
And the rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
my mother cooks
breakfast,
sizzling bacon
and pancakes
comfort food
for a rainy Saturday
The rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
my sister dances
arms outstretched
to music
from the automatic
keyboard
she is
in her mind
a ballerina
I hear her feet tapping
in her
pink snowboots
And the rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
I sit
on a chair
in my
pajamas
with a good
book
perfect for
a rainy Saturday
The rain falls, pitter-pat
I stroke
my cat's
soft fur
black as midnight
smell the
sizzling
crackling
bacon
hear the
music
and my sister's
boots,
tapping away
on the wooden floor
see the words
telling a story
spun by an
author
And still the rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill.

Author notes

Color me Shutter-Tone Deaf

Option 3

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Nam
    April 3
    Edit | Reply
    It has some nice imagery, and nice rhythm to it. A nice poem that you have written here.

    -Nam

  • this poem has a very soothing quality to it. it's gentle and sweet.
    I really enjoyed reading this.
    thanks so much for sharing it with me.
    <3


  • Snowing Kisses gold member
    February 1

    Edit | Reply
    this is lovely it is full of warm imagry and it pitter patters like the rain, i love it
    thanks for the entry


  • Danna Hobart
    January 23

    Edit | Reply
    I like your imagery, but there is a little too much repetition for my taste. Also, the description of the rain (pitter-pat) is a cliche. I am sure you could come up with an original way to express it.

    Thanks for entering my contest.


  • Nangaleema
    January 17

    Edit | Reply
    there is some very nice imagery here! i could see the scene you were describing perfectly. i think this would make a nifty picture book.
    i liked the musical quality to it too. and the aromas ...truly you have touched all the senses! neat! - NANGALEEMA


    • pinksnowboots
      January 17
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you! The picture book feel is what I was imagining when I wrote it-just the warm aura of family and love.

1 - 6 of 6