The rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
my cat,
a black shadow
yawns,
stretches
and curls up
on the couch
happy to be inside
And the rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
my mother cooks
breakfast,
sizzling bacon
and pancakes
comfort food
for a rainy Saturday
The rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
my sister dances
arms outstretched
to music
from the automatic
keyboard
she is
in her mind
a ballerina
I hear her feet tapping
in her
pink snowboots
And the rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill
I sit
on a chair
in my
pajamas
with a good
book
perfect for
a rainy Saturday
The rain falls, pitter-pat
I stroke
my cat's
soft fur
black as midnight
smell the
sizzling
crackling
bacon
hear the
music
and my sister's
boots,
tapping away
on the wooden floor
see the words
telling a story
spun by an
author
And still the rain falls, pitter-pat
on my windowsill.
Author notes
Color me Shutter-Tone Deaf
Option 3
A contest entry
- Comfort Zone by Danna Hobart.
400 points, ended January 23, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I Remember When by Snowing Kisses.
910 points, ended February 17, 60 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - want me to indulge you? okay, I will. by broken-colours.
1750 points, ended October 13, 149 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Muse of an Ember Sketch by PaintedParisPassion.
700 points, ended February 17, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Guaranteed Comments! III by Nam.
1750 points, ended April 14, 159 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I want all poems about RAIN by Atrus.
1000 points, ended September 21, 69 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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It has some nice imagery, and nice rhythm to it. A nice poem that you have written here.
-Nam
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this poem has a very soothing quality to it. it's gentle and sweet.
I really enjoyed reading this.
thanks so much for sharing it with me.
<3
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this is lovely it is full of warm imagry and it pitter patters like the rain, i love it
thanks for the entry -
I like your imagery, but there is a little too much repetition for my taste. Also, the description of the rain (pitter-pat) is a cliche. I am sure you could come up with an original way to express it.
Thanks for entering my contest. -
there is some very nice imagery here! i could see the scene you were describing perfectly. i think this would make a nifty picture book.
i liked the musical quality to it too. and the aromas ...truly you have touched all the senses! neat! - NANGALEEMA
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Thank you! The picture book feel is what I was imagining when I wrote it-just the warm aura of family and love.
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