Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Dina Finds No More Solace in Fish and Sea

 

 

 

darren places her inside
a shell, not big or smooth
not reflecting
beach in its mouth
but saw-toothed, sand creeping
skyward on one side
and seaweed tired of combing shore.

He put it so careful and deep in
his back pocket, she tasted
blue jeans and her graduation picture.



She wonders why there is
no blood or skin
in his uncut nails
proof that his tongue
hung lopsided.

 

 

 

Sometimes he takes out the shell
gives dina fresh air
to bottle the ocean stink that salts
the inner corner of eyes.

 

 

 

 

Author notes

aquamarine

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • DogFish silver member
    January 30

    Edit | Reply
    There is lots of texture in this poem and so many facets: sky, sand, shore, seaweed, shells...not to mention the emotions. Very engaging to read,"monimac"!


  • truembrace
    January 30

    Edit | Reply
    there is so much amazing and unique imagery in this. in each of your poems your voice comes alive with some gem that came of your heart and gives us this look inside of your world that is wonderful - the great days/the sad moments/the fond reflections of family... all of it is wonderful in its own way.

    best of luck in the contest.. there is so much to like about this.

    Kim


  • NurseChilly gold member
    January 21

    Edit | Reply
    a conch as big as a heart, with sounds of life and the grit of sand
    this is the colour of eyes and the sound of love

    i love this piece
    it makes me see things of you


    • J.J. Sass
      January 22
      Edit | Reply
      aww gilly, you're welcome to take a peek inside any time!


  • voices
    January 20

    Edit | Reply
    i often wondered about the salt on her breath, like there was some ancient tincture kept hidden. maybe thats why she can press out lines that cause me to look out at the shoreline and think of 1983...


    • J.J. Sass
      January 22
      Edit | Reply
      ah. I have so missed your lovely and insightful comments. Thanks so much!

      Stacy

  • Melissa Gayle gold member
    January 20

    Edit | Reply
    That second stanza is quite brilliant in relation to the first!

    But I am not sure about the third.

    Your ending is sublime as well. I really like where you took this prompt, I can not only see the color but I can taste the sea too


  • Jersene gold member
    January 17
    Edit | Reply
    I love the way you use imagery...this is excellent


  • AJ Morelli gold member
    January 17
    Edit | Reply
    this is wonderfully done Stacy



    al

1 - 13 of 13