Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Another Way Home

You looked so
You looked so beautiful

Under your make up I
Under your make up I saw so much more

Was I more than you asked for?
Was there not enough that I could give?
Is there something your hiding?
The answers aren't coming clear to me

I could pretend that I miss you but what would that do? (What would that...)
Doin' everything that I could do
I'm glad I never really fell for you

And even if I had, even if I'd began
You still looked the other way and ran
So I'm left here alone but I feel liberated
Because I know that we would've never made it
Guess it's time to find another way home

Author notes

Nothing special by any means. I wrote it and never planned to post it, but not too long after writing it, I re-read it. I'm now in love with a piece of my own work because of the simplicity that it holds. It's short, it's simple, but I feel it makes a point. Especially the last two lines.

Please tell me what you think, and be honest! ^_^ I'm not scared of criticism, I love it!

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 8 of 8
  • Oooooh my god, I really love this!!! I haven't been able to find very many poems that deal with this particular view on a relationship, but this is the one that I can most relate to, so finding it was really gratifying! It's very unique in both style and message, I can almost hear it as a song.
    "So I'm left here alone but I feel liberated
    Because I know that we would've never made it"...
    Words cannot accurately describe my agreement and adoration of these words. You described the sentiment that I often attempt to convey (with no success on my part), and you did it so effectively! I'm definitely a fan.

  • very unique writing style...this really stands out from the pack...I liked it...keep that ink flowing...peace an dlight , kp


  • devlin86
    April 30

    Edit | Reply
    i liked the way you wrote this, the effect was like a echoing within, it reminds me of the feeling left when someone turns out to be but another chapter of a long running exploration for love.

  • Ah..this is the truth you stated to bring the meaning of this life which we all live and amaze ourselves but its occurances..love the poetry you did..well done..


  • Heroesrox
    February 3

    Edit | Reply
    Why did you not plan to post this? It's great! I thank you so much for posting it here so that there was something really worth reading! That comment is weird....(The one that says something about a woman or whatever...)

    THANKS!!!!

  • inspiredbymany
    January 27

    Edit | Reply

    astonishing perfection of a real woman

    The first set was based on the nervousness of the run away. I liked how the make up was done, could be to look more attractive or I really don't need to hide the truth nor a lie. I enjoyed this writting. You artistically wrote how to blow off a loser who thought he could win it all. Pointing out in left field homerun wall as he goes to bat, and you speed throwed the ball one million miles an hour. his loss and not yours. Way to go girl. You knew his bluff butt needed to be in the toliet and flushed away all of his sickness. I am proud of you and giving me time to read this.


  • StarEyes
    January 24

    Edit | Reply
    How much truth your simple words hold! What a great read this one is! One never knows when they will find that, another way home, or whatever the case may be! This is great, and I am so glad that I found it!

1 - 8 of 8