They call me Goldenshower, cause I am a rainy ray of sunshine! Not because I enjoy being peed on! So people don't make the mistake of trying that again or you'll find my size seven boots up your bootie!
I am all smiles with abnormally big bright Marie Osmond type teeth, my grin could light a city, at least that's what mother says, she could be biased though.
I'm so happy all the time, rainbows fart right out of my bottom, it's true, I'll show you my multicolored stained underpants if you don't believe me!!
I have a boyfriend, a real one, not a pretend one, mother says not to make up boyfriends anymore or I'll have to stay in that special place over the summer again! So I got me a real live boyfriend, his nickname is "Bud" cause he smokes a lot of grass, he's not my ideal choice but at least when I pinch him to see if he's real, he punches back, so I know I'm safe. He's going to take me to Prom if he's out of jail by then!!
Mother and me live on a farm, we have lots of livestock that I forget to feed sometimes…Oops!
They're kind of skinny and the authorities have been called on us, I think we may have to move again!
But I'm not discouraged! No, not me, life is a box of chocolates so what if it's a box of chocolate Ex-lax that gives you the runs most of the time. When you're shooting anal rainbows more the merrier.
My main friends are my stuffed toy bears, my favorite ones are Madonna and Guy, but they seem to be on the outs, so they live in separate rooms and are in litigation over Baby Bear Rocco. Then there's George W. Bush Bear, he's kind of worn out with ears missing, I think it's time to pitch him! But my very favorite bear is “Obama Bear” he's all shiny and new, him I think I'll keep!
Well that's enough for now, if you want to e-mail me just send messages to
**Golden**Shower.com
Please make sure and put in asterisks or you'll get someone whose meaning of shower
is something quite disgusting.
Groups I'm in, The Whips and Chains Gang, Tie me up in knots Tots,
Bathroom hyjinks and Other Potty Poetry and the group.. Shower Me With Golden Moments, also knowns as 'If it's yellow let it mellow group'
* Last seen, Never... too shy to post anything, Member since the Big Bang
* I'm a Disturbed Person poet for 0 comments
* My motto is, DON'T EAT THE YELLOW SNOW
* I am a 13 year old girl going on 30 ( I wish)
* When I'm not writing, I stare at the walls until they start moving
* I support the site as a Plutonium member, my writing is radioactive and
should only be read with a radioactive suit on.
A contest entry
- Start the New Year with a Fake Author Page! by Melodies.
700 points, ended January 18, 8 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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OHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
EVERYTHING HERE IS JUST enough to give a reader and laughing fit! You are amazing, good poet... I'd like to plug into this kind of humor.
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This little Brat with the Metal Plate in the head is immune to your radioactive writes
What a page Doc
So it was you who stole my boyfriend huh...no worries for me as I have cleaned up my act and good riddens to him
Good luck with this pearler
Le Brat
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Can I join some of those groups? Look like fun.
The worls needs more rainbows!!!
Joe
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Yes, indeed, you are seriously distrubed--and funny
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I love it!!!!
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nope... we don't get the honor of seeing those babies... aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh! I can hear them, though! Tweet tweet...
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I think I'm done for a second, 'cause I gotta go see if she's gonna get off of those chicks and let us see them! Tweet tweet!
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We have baby chickens! We just went out there about an hour ago and there were cracking noises and tweeting noises and mamma was making quiet little clucks and squirming around 'cause the chicks were breakin' out of their eggs and pokin her in the arse! But, she's a good mamma, and she sits there and keeps 'em warm no matter how much of a pain in the arse they are.
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now, I'm listening to "A Boy Named Sue..." by Johnny Cash... think you should write a poem with that title.
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I think I'm on a roll here, I don't know when I might stop...
I have been listening to "You are My Sunshine" the whole time I've been reading this and writing, totally made me laugh more, 'cause really I started reading this right when the song started and I read, "rainy ray of sunshine" and I had to laugh. -
If my husband says that one more time, I'm gonna smack him... "if it's brown flush it down, if it's yellow let it mellow." How about, "no matter the shade a flushing must be made!" harharhar!
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That was a gasp for breath, not a gasp like "oh my goodness!" Yeah, had to clarify that after reading my comment.
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Gaaaaaasp!
Thanks for the laugh, Doc!
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