the sunrise crumbled.
the grass grew down
and left the earth
bare beneath my toes.
the sky was verdant
with sun blood
i remembered your yellows,
your hesitant violet eyes.
Author notes
option seventeen.
A contest entry
- OPTIONS -- Come on and look! by broken-colours.
600 points, ended January 30, 2009, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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This is so amazing, I love the spacing of the lines and the way you worded it was just vibrant. You defintely deserve a shiny. Incredible poem.
'the sunrise crumbled' what an image.
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"the sky was verdant
with sun blood"
Verdant, what a word. And "sun blood"... so many vivid images arise from such a small phrase!
And the ending... makes me picture a boy with deep eyes and fairly pale skin. One of those that has an intense stare, but he hardly ever uses it.
This was beautiful. And a bit complicated. I'm not entirely sure about the overall theme of it, but every piece was stunning.
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