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Stroll at Sunset

The water doesn't ruin any of my painful memory,
of dragging sticks across the sand while walking by the sea,
of sunshine, rain, all clouded pain; the story stays the same.
The moon had broke my heart of glass, alas!  I was to blame!
My lips pressed into shards of glass as dirt clung to my face;
I turned a leaf out on the tiles but missed my hiding place.
Your bracelet clung my wrist just like a leaf the wet concrete;
I hugged you like a teddy bear, but I could not compete.
A cloud above my rain cap splatters all my tears like ink,
I could have been...what could have been...now all I do is think.
The water doesn't ruin any of my painful memory,
but still I stroll the seashore, throwing branches in the sea.

Author notes

I used all the words in the word bank, incorporated the title prompt, and created a silhouette, which is a shadow filled outline of something. I still think it's crap, but there it is.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Noir mariposa...x gold member
    February 17
    Edit | Reply
    "Your bracelet clung my wrist just like a leaf the wet concrete;
    I hugged you like a teddy bear, but I could not compete."

    I have to agree with DesolatElife, that was an amazing line

    I congratulate for using all the prompts, you did well

    Thank you for entering,
    I wish you the best of luck!
    Claire x


  • DesolatELifE
    January 7

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this one is almost personal (to me).

    I think 'I hugged you like a teddy bear, but I could not compete.' is such an amazing line.

    Love the ending. I like that you said the 'water doesn't ruin'.. as though, even though it's painful, the memory is still beautiful (I don't think beautiful is the right word, but I can't be bothered to think).

    Dinner time, and I'd like to compliment this some more.

  • it is not crap it's good, and just the fact that you incorporated every prompt in one poem, is really amazing. I think you could do really well. so good luck to you.

    • zorman32
      January 7
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks very much, I didn't really intend that the poem was crap, but rather the situation...still, I didn't like the poem a whole lot either, but thank you again.

1 - 6 of 6