Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Undulating

That day the earth stood still, as the waves churned;
I was hypnotized by the movement-
I never even noticed my tears.
The rhythm of the ocean was all I knew.

Shadows crept up on shore,
and the symphony turned into a maelstrom;
vibrant and threatening, it's tone.
Still the calm underneath called to me.

I felt it ripple through my skin,
sinuous, violent then altogether calm;
it was urging me home with its wistful tune.
The waves kept crashing, beckoning.

A sweet song filled my head as fire erupted,
and the waves subsided, calm;
the rhythm left just a haunting, faraway note.
Another soul claimed by the sea.

Author notes

rose blood 87

The power the ocean has over some people; it has claimed so many lives with its haunting melodies. The 'symphony' got louder as she approached her demise, and after she died (A sweet song filled my head as fire erupted,-meaning she passed out as her lungs burst), the rhythm existed only in her head.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • amaranthine lover gold member
    January 21, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    a nice & lovely little piece here thanks for entering


  • SeaWithYourHeart
    January 12, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    wow absolutely what i asked for. you really thought about your prompt here. all those oxymoronic metaphors its fantastic!
    i cant even pick a favorite bit
    wait yeah liked these parts because they juxtapose eachoteher!
    "vibrant and threatening, it's tone.
    Still the calm underneath called to me."

    and then

    "A sweet song filled my head as fire erupted,
    and the waves subsided, calm;
    the rhythm left just a haunting, faraway note.
    Another soul claimed by the sea."

    good luck!


  • SeaWithYourHeart
    January 7, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    ok this is a hard one but i have no doubt that the challenge will thrill your creative ability everyone has 2 days from now to finnish their poem so here we go your prompt is: Undulating Rythmns. so try metaphor's like sound waves and rippled flutes. try it this could be fun.good luck
    undulating means a wave pattern like sound waves. you could have a play on word and use the ocean as well becasue its the same shape.

1 - 6 of 6