“Who’s this?” a girl demands
“Just an old friend,
love.”
I say as I'm staring
into someone
else’s
Eyes
And she wonders about something other-
I don’t hear it
And the eyes of my focus
turn from shock to a calm confusion
Almost like
Happiness…
“Grant?”
staring
"HEY!"
The inquisitor, my girlfriend
Slaps me as hard as she can in my black shirted arm
And I feel a backwards ring
tear into me
A little bit-
Most probably
one of the ones
I gave her
And I can see her turning red
with rage
And pain-
it made her mad:
hitting me,
she hurt nothing
but herself
-to be fragile is
frustrating-
she screams,
“stop staring at her!”
And “Look here
BITCH,
he’s mine, OKAY
Fuck off!
An old friend, my ASS
You bastard,
Let’s go
Grant”
And she pulls at my hand with hers;
The one that I was slapped with;
And as she plows ahead like a one engine airplane
Desperately needing another one
to give flight;
still red,
A little foamy around
the mouth,
Starting to sweat
rhino breathing-
While passing
I took Jessica’s hand
in mine
real tight
And gave a look that said more
than making love
Could
And the scene was turned to ice
for a moment and
there were muted fireworks in my head
And bad music
from a nearby store
Started
to smell
like
Roses
And then we were god
and man
in creation of the world
On the Sistine
Chapel
My rosary beads are for you
With our fingers reaching towards
each other
I was dragged off
into a
different
Hell
Author notes
and I missed yours..
A contest entry
- .give me something amazing. by landmark.
1650 points, ended January 7, 50 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
-
hitting me,
she hurt nothing
but herself
-to be fragile is
frustrating- ...
everytime i think it cant get no better. you prove me wrong. this was a great piece. and somewhere far away from the both of us . is someone standing looking at "an old friend" and wishing they read this piece ...
missed you


-
And gave a look that said more
than making love
Could
wow honey.. i wish i could put how i feel into words asa beautifully and as heartfelt as you do..

-
Amazing!
As a woman, I know the feelings one experiences when the one you are with has eyes only for someone else -- raging pain doesn't come close! But I never thought of the feelings a guy might be going through as well, which you have written so extremely well here -- I've never seen anything quite like this before: such longing, love, sense of loss; you've done an outstanding piece here.
and


-
-
hey when you said raging pain doesn't come close, it got me thinking, maybe those words are too vague for it, so i added a section to increase the feeling about halfway through. do you think maybe you could read it and tell me what you think?
it's eight in the mornin ha, so it's probably trash
idk,
but this poem still in the "works" i guess.
-
-
And gave a look that said more
than making love
Could
And the scene was turned to ice
for a moment and
there were muted fireworks in my head
And bad music
from a nearby store
Started
to smell
like
Roses
wowza. i love the top line in this
it makes me wish.
andd
My rosary beads are for you
With our fingers reaching towards
each other
I was dragged off
into a
different
Hell
that is heartbreaking
i love what you said in the authors notes.
i forgot hom much i love your poetry.

-
-
thanks love,
maybe ill put some more up later,
ive just been in a strange mood.
you write anything in florida?
-
-
“Who’s this?” a next to me girl demands
“Just an old friend,
love.”
I say as I'm staring
into someone
else’s
Eyes
------------------------
=/
know that too well
-to be fragile is
frustrating-
---------------------
son of bitch it is
damn
..
its like you know
great job honey
<33

-
I clicked on this because of the title. It's good.
Your poem painted a good picture of helpless attraction to someone, and some of the consequences... -
This is truely amaing not what I expected at all.Good luck in the contest.Your words were very heartfelt and original.Great job.
-
Wow that is horrible for a girl to treat her guy like that but I have seen it oh too many times. Its a sad sight. Well written.
-
Your girlfriend sounds abusive and aggressive. Her vocabulaly does not seem lady like. Dump her!
-
oh wow hahaha. is this a true story?
you gave life to poetry. real life.
loved that ending. it's not like you can help how you feel. title is perfect
ps 2nd to last line differant should be different

1 - 12 of 12









