I hate this
I feel like crap
And the stupid bloody rhyme box
Has got me in a flap.
It's suggesting rubbish rhymes
Laughing in my face
But I can't think for myself,
So the rhyme help should be ace
But not today,
Oh, no
The one day that I need it
A good rhyme it cannot bestow.
A cause for writer's suicide
And they give it a stupid name like "writer's block"?
Hell, I call it. Hell, and that stupid,
bloody rhyme-box can do nothing but mock.
Not in my language, sonny-Jim,
Does "block" rhyme with "Iraq"
But that's fair enough, all I can think of
Is the Cutty Sark.
And that burned down
Just like my brain today
Oh, why, oh, why
Did my mind die today?
Because I am left,
On one of the worst days of my life
With this idiotic rhyme-box
Giving me nothing but strife.
So if my rhymes seem simple
It's because they are
because my brain has gone to hell
And (insert something here) afar.
Today is not the day
To be screwing me around
But my creative spark
Has left me nothing profound.
So please, if you see her
My Muse has gone away
Tell her to get her arse back here
So I'm not stuck with a cliché.
What a day for my muse to go away
When hell on earth is apparently here to stay
And now I've gone and rhymed the wrong line
ABAB and AABB I've had to combine
To create a piece I neither like
Nor care about
But the idea that I needed a release
Was never in any doubt.
So I can't write it seems,
Without this damnedest box
When will my muse come back, I think
As I stare at all my clocks.
it's this boxes' fault
The reason my work is shite
And now I've gone and used a word
It really doesn't like.
So please, understand
Although it was unplanned
I hate this poem
For it's not the one I planned.
And there I go again
"Planned" and "unplanned" in one line
And, yes, I had every intention
Of passing that crap off as rhyme
So please, I can't stand it
Any longer
Brain, come back to me
and let my rhymes get stronger.
Author notes
I'm having one hell of a day, and tried to write a poem, and couldn't think of any rhymes, turned to the box and well, it was a bit crap for me in my depressed and annoyed state, so I wrote this instead.
A contest entry
- Bored Enter!!!!! Need to Read Something!!!!! by KrissyRachele.
700 points, ended January 8, 132 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Anything (PW Allowed) by swimmeroks.
900 points, ended January 6, 111 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Haha, this was so entertaining. I hate it when this happens, and though I've never ventured to experiment with the rhyme box, you made me want to try it out just to see what ridiculous rhymes it would give me. "And (insert something here) afar" made me lol. I do that all the time. Thanks for posting this, it made my sucky day suck less.
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good job!
it's hard for me to create a poem while getting frusturated, but in a way it creates an influence.
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lol
i enjoyed your rant here about the rhyme box...sounds like a rather rough day. this, though is clever and Hilarious, so something good has come from your missing muse!! -
AWESOME
Wow!! That's a whole lotta crap for writer's block!!!! LMAO!!! I dont' care what the books say...just write write crap, write more crap and from it will come roses!!!
. Rewarded 4
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I am a fan of rhyme, and I am so sorry but this is the funniest one I think I have ever read, probably because I can so relate.
So please, if you see her
My Muse has gone away
Tell her to get her arse back here
So I'm not stuck with a cliché.
mine's been missing for awhile too.
Sorry about your bad day, but you made mine, lol. -
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Thanks
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despite you having such a bad day and all the crappy things going on, (and i tried not to laugh) but this poem is fucking hilarious!! i absolutely loved these 2 stanzas:
"What a day for my muse to go away
When hell on earth is apparently here to stay
And now I've gone and rhymed the wrong line
ABAB and AABB I've had to combine"
"And there I go again
"Planned" and "unplanned" in one line
And, yes, I had every intention
Of passing that crap off as rhyme"
those were SO funny!! and i definitely understand the crap with the rhyme box, that's why i started googling "what rhymes with...." lol.
i'm sorry everything's sucking, and i hope this helped you relieve some of your stress, because this was pretty great. i can honestly say, i've never read anything like it. great.
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Thank you. Though I read it back and cringe slightly. Because I had no idea where I was going with it, I just that stupid bloody ox guide me!
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lol, don't cringe!! it totally made "januaryrain"s day. XD. haha. it was enjoying to read, and SOO true!
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