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sun-



I like the way you decide
   to light everything
     and when your rays hit my eyes just right I swear I see you reflected

       in them...


I like the way you try so hard to not fall in love.




I love;
  the taste of bland things like jicama
  and I knew that when you spit it out
and said it reminded you of water.
that it wasn’t meant to be..


water is the sweetest thing I have ever tasted.


I swear;
I saw you
flinch the first time you
had to actually light my path
my face
my lips
and my gaze


I swear I saw you flinch








I started to develop an allergic reaction to the radiation coming off you and your sun spots
and pretty soon my whole skin crawled
begging for some sort of cure
and you told me it was sugar.


like the kind you brought to a boil and drizzled
each day on
earth

scalding

       yet beautiful



and I must admit I like the days where there isn’t a cloud in sight and
the sky is as blue as Satan’s eyes.
           because at least you smiled


but I’m getting this urge  to fall in love with my roots
like the Aztecs who loved
chocolate
and believed that their dreams where everything

you know
the people that made human sacrifices
and couldn’t wait to die...

-

tengo la esperanza que un dia tu espanol quebrado
me diga
   te amo


but I wont hold my breath


-







I realize why you don’t like water..

 

 

 

 

 


fear

 

 


after all you are one big
ball of

 

 

 

 

 

 




ice.

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

this is a leter to the sun but i am all too sure that he will read it and it will burn in his hands
and he will forget.


i didnt get much sleep
because all i thought about was how you would shine on my face in an hour
and how much i love that...



idk
i feel all
..?


like i really need it to not be cloudy .

[[ dont just stand there and think, take action and tell me. lets fix this like a broken mirror... talk to me.]';



mood ring turned red
- written-in-ink

In a list

A contest entry

astroturf?

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 35 of 35

  • oldschoolhero gold member
    September 4

    Edit | Reply
    omg red isnt good
    i think
    blue/green is good
    D:
    this poem is good
    D:
    does that make me confused
    lol

    [=
    this poem is amaaaaaaaaaazing
    i remember it


  • jayyniecakes.
    February 21
    Edit | Reply
    one of my favorites of yours thanx 4 entering it :]


  • sharptooth
    February 21

    Edit | Reply
    this was quite nice. . i love the style & narration; enjoyable to read


  • jayyniecakes.
    February 5
    Edit | Reply
    this. is. amazing. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  • Chocolate Dime
    February 2

    Edit | Reply
    i happened to stumble upon this... and oh my gawrsh... this is...brrrrrilliant! oh my. you are very talented, i hope you know that. good luck in the contest(s)!

    -lauren


  • Paloszoo gold member
    January 30

    Edit | Reply
    Brilliantly creative! Well done, Poet! I thank you for entering my humble contest. It's always a pleasure to read a favorite's work


  • Nostalgic Moon
    January 25

    Edit | Reply
    oh wow this is basically brilliant! i love it!!

    "scalding
    yet beautiful

    and I must admit I like the days where there isn’t a cloud in sight and
    the sky is as blue as Satan’s eyes.
    because at least you smiled"

    that part made me go ...
    You amaze me, as always.
    I enjoyed reading this very muchly!

    Thank you



  • new born
    January 11
    Edit | Reply
    Hallo!
    This is a beautiful write.
    <3<3 Great job and good luck.


  • letters to no one
    January 9

    Edit | Reply
    "I realize why you don’t like water..

    fear

    after all you are one big
    ball of

    ice."

    Poor person, they really should just take the leap and let themself fall in love.

    I like.
    Muchly.


    Shelly
    x


  • Catie Sheeran gold member
    January 4

    Edit | Reply
    very cleverly written and different...I really like the ending ...good luck to ya


  • Shancy Fayre
    January 4
    Edit | Reply
    This is quite unique in its translation from paper to mind. It is a good job. Shancy.


  • najji
    January 3

    Edit | Reply
    amazing.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YacSnjpGkk

    i was listening to that and damn.

    'I started to develop an allergic reaction to the radiation coming off you and your sun spots
    and pretty soon my whole skin crawled
    begging for some sort of cure
    and you told me it was sugar.'

    i could never develop sunspots. my best friend has them all over her back.

    that makes me think of popsicles.

    <3 you're amazing and you never cease to give me amazing images.


  • broken-colours
    January 3
    Edit | Reply
    "dreams where everything" = "dreams were everything"

    "I like the way you decide
    to light everything
    and when your rays hit my eyes just right I swear I see you reflected

    in them...


    I like the way you try so hard to not fall in love."

    What an amazing way to open a poem! The images were very relatable and vibrant and made me want to read on.

    "each day on
    earth

    scalding

    yet beautiful" That was very poignant and stood out to me. I love how you spaced out the words.


    And you claim you're jealous of me, silly.
    You're one of those poets that I could never compliment enough.

    • written-in-ink
      January 3

      Edit | Reply
      aw thank you so much my love

      you make me feel good about what i write
      see people like you are the reason i keep posting things
      you make me feel like im worth something i swear

      ily
      so much
      and yes i am still jealous

      • broken-colours
        January 3

        Edit | Reply
        You are worth something. Don't persuade yourself into believing any differently.
        Your voice, your words have worth. And not only that but they're gorgeous.

        Well, guess I'm glad you find me talented... ^^'


  • MizaLePiza
    January 3
    Edit | Reply
    Gosh how I love reading 'Random' poems...it always gives me the most wonderful writes. Bravo.


  • chloris
    January 3

    Edit | Reply

    water is the sweetest thing I have ever tasted.>>> i liked this...
    after all you are on big>>>..one..??? typo.


    i really liked this... i wish you could enter it. i feel the frustration of a lover here...

  • new born
    January 3

    Edit | Reply
    This is so melancholy, but hopeful and beautiful. I just...wow. Great job. I adore the spanish bit, 'I hope that one day your broken spanish will say I love you' I think that's it, but I'm not sure. THis was original and beautiful and just fantastic.
    btw, I absolutely adore sunny days too. :]


  • AniLee
    January 3

    Edit | Reply

    BEAUTIFUL

    I'm glad I hit
    Read, Random
    now.

    This is fantastic... And really what I needed to read at this point
    so
    thank you
    for that^^


  • etoile
    January 3

    Edit | Reply
    I like the way you try so hard to not fall in love.




    I love;
    the taste of bland things like jicama
    and I knew that when you spit it out
    and said it reminded you of water.
    that it wasn’t meant to be..


    water is the sweetest thing I have ever tasted.
    ----
    that was just beautiful and brilliant. i loveeee it. the imagery and originality of it is amazing. and i like how you made it personal by writing abotu yoru own experiances.

    and I must admit I like the days where there isn’t a cloud in sight and
    the sky is as blue as Satan’s eyes.
    because at least you smiled
    ---
    oh shit. i liek the blue of satan's eyes bit. that's quite scary. and i love it.

    the part with the aztecs is awesome as well. and whats the spanish part mean? i understoof espanol and te amo lmfao.
    and the ending is WOAH. so strong.

    you're so good at writing!!!
    ♥

    • written-in-ink
      January 3
      Edit | Reply
      thank you so much love

      the spanish bit means
      " i have the hope that your broken spanish will one day say i love you"

      it was this thing i was writting for this spanish contest
      but i thought it fit in well there.


      and thank you again love
      <33

1 - 35 of 35