i couldn’t help but follow and wait.
.
You wandered main roads creating diversions: planting traffic lights and stop signs. Pavements that were more gum than concrete crumbled beneath accident after accident, buried somewhere under tires and windscreens, my feet lost your path.
.
Once you left me between bed sheets. All i could do was rub my cheek along the cold side of pillows and sigh into silk blankets. i remained silent and listened out for your footsteps, but all i heard was the gentle click of the front door and the turn of a key. Locked inside your heart i was waiting for your numbness to fade, so i may inflict some kind of feeling upon you.
.
Question after question tumbled out of your parted lips. There was never certainty or consideration. Never have you looked into my eyes. To you there was no such thing as love.
.
i accepted living in shadows and whispering i love you into traces of where you once were.
Author notes
prompt; obstacles to love
A contest entry
- Morning Quickie - 10 entries by sideways hourglass.
400 points, ended January 3, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - & you're covered in the lotion that was inside of me; by forbidden-colour.
520 points, ended January 14, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
-
I really enjoy your prose you write in a very entertaining way that leaves you thinking afterwards.
-
interesting
i really like this -
uhmm, different, nice
-
beautifull
I love it when a writing make me sillent and make the world disappear. This really happened here, getting lost in words is a great feeling. You gave it to me
beautifull piece!!
B-
-thanks for your comment-
-
STUNNED
I am humbled by your brilliance and command of the written word. I enjoy it when what i am reading draws pictures in my imagination. This poem has painted a masterpiece
-
"my feet lost your path."
I loved this, definatly one of my favourites in this contest, thank you for entering!
-
i think ii & iii were your strongest; there was a perfect balance of abstraction, imagery, and emotion. it came together cohesively.
the next two parts were more blunt & didn't live up to the caliber of the first half, in my opinion.
regardless, this was beautiful. i really did love this.
-
good god you are so talented. I'm honestly so happy that I searched that new members group all those months ago, because if I hadn't I might have never read your writing. you're prose is so mature and carries this amazing overtone of wisdom and personal experience and sort of familiarity with life and gah. this is heartwreching and vivid and thought provoking and again, with your signature 'saying so much in so few words' style. even when writing prose.
gah okay I'm at a loss for what else to say except keep on writing/ you're amazing.
-
-
aww thank you so much.
that's honestly one of the most lovely comments i've ever recieved!
thank youuu.
x
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 9 of 9
