new year's day has passed
resolutions already
broken sans regret
A contest entry
- Contemporary Haiku by Harrisham Minhas.
525 points, ended January 21, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I had to look up sans, didn't know what it meant. I love how relatable this haiku is, good luck!
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Thanks for your entry:
"new year's day has passed
resolutions already
broken sans regret"
This is a nice one. I am sure many people can relate to this.
Thanks again.
Harrisham Minhas
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Harrisham Minhas
Thankyou for your comments and for your very generous applause.
Best wishes from 'down-under'.
Shenton
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Hi! This poem tells the reader what happened rather than showing the reader. A good haiku must 'show' rather than 'tell'. L1 is a complete statement and is telling something. L1, L2 and L3 reveal it is in 'past tense'. This needs some tweaking.
Let's try it out...
evaporated whisky -
the new year resolutions
in my gut
Charishma
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Charishma
Methinks you do presume too much; I don't drink whisky!
But I can offer you my best wishes for this New Year.
Shenton
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