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Alone, Broken, and Beautiful

and as he walked away leaving her for the very last time
she watched with her head held high
tears hanging in her eyes as she tried to understand what was happening
and in this confusion
the broken
the hurt
the empty
the lonely
the numb
little girl that she was took hold
and for those few seconds
she looked more beautiful than anything you could comprehend
because the pain she held inside
forced the inner beauty out
and as he turned around for a final look at his creation
he realised at once what he had lost.

Author notes

This is just somthing i was thinking about and i just realised that in every pain there is a misunderstood and amazing beauty.

Hi. comments?

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Nikonic Freak silver member
    November 20
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    This is magnificent.
    I usually try not to quote huge chunks of poem when I point out my favorite parts, but the ending spoke to me so much I have to copy&paste the whole thing:
    "...for those few seconds
    she looked more beautiful than anything you could comprehend [good. i hope that guy feels sorry. >:[ ]
    because the pain she held inside
    forced the inner beauty out [as all pain should. great concept/line!]
    and as he turned around for a final look at his creation
    he realised at once what he had lost." [SUCK IT, LOSER.]
    ❤


  • daviscth silver member
    January 25

    Edit | Reply
    The imagery in your piece is amazing and overflows with emotional undercurrents. I love the title too. I suck at free verse so can't offer any suggestions but I did enjoy this very much.