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my new friends know me better


I gave up.

You see, all those days
you told me I wasn't good enough,
I started to believe you.
But I found friends, ones that love me,
in the pills and they say I'm beautiful
and I deserve better.

~ and I like what they tell me ~

I'm spoken to when I need it most
and you don't seem to know when
to shut up or when to hold me close.
I refuse to be your experiment.
To see if you really understand the opposite sex,
oh no, that is not going to be my purpose.

[I don't have "guinea pig"
  tattooed on my forehead]

And all the round purples
and square blues love me like
no one else seems to.

~ And you wouldn't believe
   what they're telling me to do. ~

 

Author notes

AP Name: Lowercase Prelude

Prompt - 7. Abusing a substance.

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • Grave Girl
    November 20
    Edit | Reply
    Aww . Thats really cool . Thats Awesome !


  • shecantstopfalling.
    January 29

    Edit | Reply
    "~And you wouldn't beliee what they're telling me to do.~"

    This line is brilliant, as is the rest of the poem good luck the contest and congrads on the trophies.


  • Angelo di Luce gold member
    January 28

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for your entry, I find it powerful and full of pain
    Good luck


  • Chainsaw
    January 9

    Edit | Reply
    Nice use of personification. I like the title, and the way you begin it with a blunt, bolded, "I gave up."

    It's a bit disjointed though - for example, two sentences in a row beginning with "and" at the end, and there should either be a capital at the start of "~ and I like what they tell me ~", or a comma instead of a full stop at the end of the previous line.

    Also, I felt that circular brackets would be more appropriate than square for "[I don't have "guinea pig"/tattooed on my forehead]".

    I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for entering, it means a lot to me


  • XneverXgoodXenoughX
    January 8
    Edit | Reply
    y0u did a great job describing the feeling youve felt . very thought out.

  • JumbledThoughts
    January 5

    Edit | Reply
    Abuse is abuse, abuse is abuse. Whether at our own hands or someone else. At our hand, Silence hears our cries. Such an emotional write! Well Written!


  • serenity silvermoon
    January 4

    Edit | Reply
    very good poem you have here you penned it so wonderful its good that you wont let men puss you around good luck in the other contest to me its a winner


  • Lady Altheia gold member
    January 3

    Edit | Reply
    Abusing substances is easy to do because we depend on them so much, too much to take away the pain quickly.


  • stasis
    January 3

    Edit | Reply
    This is insanely good.
    That's all I can really say right now.
    I love it.

    ♣ Tegan


  • heavenbird gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    This is really really beautiful.
    It's probably the best drug abuse poem I've read.
    Awesome work, and best of luck! =]

1 - 13 of 13