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Incidental echo

 

 

Ebony walls speak to me, foundations of gone
                                                                possibilities.

 

Silvering my own existence upon their mirror
                                            of crouching smells.


I breathe the me inside
         &
come out drained ,

                     stumbling on the steps

of my future's temple. 

 

As I climb it up, praying with tattooed hands

& fingers; 

              I mop the floor off of you.

 

Now you’re a distant echo
                       An incidental echo
That once was free to be deflected upon
                                        my lands.

 

 

 

 

                       It was a chance 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(C) Noor 1/2/2009 

Author notes

Contest prompt:
free form, free verse on: "incidental"
Picture found on Google.

Thanks for reading!

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • morgana raven Greeters member
    January 17

    Edit | Reply
    Ooo, i loved this picture. The poem as well ofc, brilliant wording and very well written.
    Great write.
    Laura


  • azure85 gold member
    January 9

    Edit | Reply
    Very good use of images and feelings, this poem has layers as depths into the soul as you read it. An inventive use of the prompt, thank you so much!


  • mcope8050
    January 4

    Edit | Reply
    As I climb it up, praying with tattooed hands

    & fingers;

    I mop the floor off of you.


    This is very deep,,, each time I read it ,,it seems to take me somewhere different than before,,,,can't wait to read it again,,, and see where I end up,,, this time


    good luck in the contest

    Michael


  • Draig aine gold member
    January 3

    Edit | Reply

    well done

    I breathe the me inside
    &
    come out drained ,

    stumbling on the steps

    of my future's temple.

    stunning

  • Excellent

    I quite like this one and its brooding imagery. Did you mean 'of', instead of 'off'? Just wondering. Again, very well written.


  • joelegy
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    this was very beautiful.
    I really like the spacing going on there.
    goo job


  • Pisces rainbow gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply

    Such a pleasure to read your words my friend

    I breathe the me inside

                 &

     come out drained

    such a universal feeling and so proundly expressed

    amazing read

    God bless you my friend...


  • JohnnyD gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    whoa- a little darkness huh?

    Ebony walls silhouetted by the pain of rememberences

    oh-yeah-been there-suffered that\\



    Dad


  • Ken-Maverick
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    Well penned on the prompt my friend,
    He must've been a foolish guy indeed.
    All the best to you in the contest

    Ken

1 - 9 of 9