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In the Static.

Touch my voice with your pen
and write me a song,
knowing that in the end
I will be the one that lingers
while you disappear into, nothing...

Author notes

Exactly what the title says, really!
I'm limiting you to five lines at most.That sounds like enough restriction so I'm leaving the theme to your choice.Do your best! I look forward to judging this one

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 22 of 22
  • Ah..this is so beautiful..and so much touching concept..made me smile and took me towards the universal scenario onwards..love it...


  • thejollytinker
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    Yeah- where exactly is nothing? I don' have to go, do I?

  • i love how this ends
    fantastic piece


  • AutumnGypsy gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    This is gorgeous hun, you captured so much in these short lines, and what a five lines they are. Fabulous hun. Best to you in the contest


  • maralisa silver member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    a wonderful poem full of depth and emotion good luck inthe contestmaralisa


  • Joseph Hollis
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    The static resonates here. You've captured much emotion in such brevity. Best of luck to you in the contest.


  • Overcast
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful!


  • In Too Deep1
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    Such a soft and beautiful suicide of birth, as love inhales, ignites, and explodes. Reminds me of a balck widow with angel wings. Very enjoyable write, and best wishes in the comp.


  • poeticweaver gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply

    Potent Piece...

    You weaved here within few lines, I like how it gets to the point, but still has the poet pondering a bit, as you pen such beautiful imagery. Touch my voice with your pen. -sigh- I like that, Thanks for sharing you, and all the best within the contest!

    Timothy.


  • geckogirl silver member
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    you rock girl..good luck ay... your song lives on..


  • Raining Kisses silver member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    wow hae very creative, you worked wonders with the line limit, this is a wonderful little gem of a poem
    thanks

  • imahealer
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    What you can do in five lines tells an entire story. A friend of mine is just producing a SONG CALLED "IF YOU WERE A SONG" IN THE COUNTRY GENRE. your title drew me unto your verse. Good choice. I was off site for two months. Wish I had read you before. Simple words, powerful meaning. Best wishes.

    LInda


  • Swangrnv gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply

    WOW

    A great opening and the rest is just as amazing! good job poetess.


  • Jeremy0826 silver member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    Deep and beautifully written!
    Good luck in this contest and I hope
    that you do well with it here!




    Jeremy0826


  • Unsigned gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice sis...

    I like to dissapear into Nothing now and agian..

    Simon

    XX


  • Ademon
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    The entire poem is so incredibly deep and amazing I love it all...the last line is like...WOW... "while you disappear into, nothing..." perfect. GOOD LUCK~

  • ....'i will be the one that lingers
    while you disappear into, nothing'

    ah. the beauty of song.
    written in words
    i really really enjoyed this!

1 - 22 of 22