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Wild Beauty

She always seems so beautiful, so tender and so wise.
I long to hold her in my arms, to love her till she dies.
But all I see’s the open road, reflected in her eyes.

Author notes

My attempt attempt at a rhyming Sijo. Option #3

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

  • WiltedRose0777
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    So nice... I'm sure this one will make the ladies melt. But constructively, I would suggest rewriting the line "But all I see’s the open road" so you don't have the contraction of see's. It just seems to interrupt the flow a bit.
    Still it's a wonderful poem with many interpretation possibilities and just a nice overall image.


  • Angelflower
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    This was really beautiful.. The word usage was tender and lovely. As was the imagery that you crafted. I truly enjoyed reading this. Thank you very much for sharing. Best of luck in the contest.

    Angel


  • ZachP gold member
    January 2

    Edit | Reply
    I love this take on what seems to be the popular prompt of the evening The form is wonderful; I'll have to try it sometime. Your rhyme is excellent, BTW -- no worries.

    Best of luck,
    Zach