Yes
I think about the way
you frowned and made faces at my oh so extravagant way of saying hello
and
I remember that I never once looked at anything else that wasn’t you
Someone smiled at us.
But I still
felt your feet burn holes into the ground; cigarette butts
and all I wanted to say was light them
show me that the world
smells
different
when you
ignite it
when you start every day with a smile on your face, and I stare in your eyes instead of the sun
even though its equally blinding.
-
I have a great passion
for candles
and when I find one that smells just right
its going in our home.
and i hope to god that the scent we pick isn’t "Christmas"
but lemons.
Author notes
i smell candles with people i want to have a future with
whatever that future may be.
there i wrote it for you
with that title even though im sure its a weird one
haha
like?
In a list
A contest entry
- Beautiful minds....please enter. by islekine.
760 points, ended January 11, 27 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
astroturf?
Comments
1 - 31 of 31
-
"I think about the way
you frowned and made faces at my oh so extravagant way of saying hello
and
I remember that I never once looked at anything else that wasn’t you"
=]
I like, but it's sad, kinda.
I've been there, and I miss it.
Good luck in the contest,
Shelly
x -
very unique write!
Best wishes in the contest!
I hope you find your Christmas candle!
Be well and blessed!
-
-
thank you
-
-
Your conversational style is unique and it makes the reader feel priveleged to be included.
-
-
thank you so much
<33
-
-
A very interesting poem. I love the metaphors and the vivid imagery. The flow is especially superb, and perfectly modulated. Even the line breaks work well.
Overall, a good piece of poetry. Good luck! -
-
thank you
<33
-
-
It's funny how closely I can relate with such an odd bit of personal poetry that I clicked on at random. One of my favorite memories is smelling votives at a Yankee Candle Factory outlet with my boyfriend & trying to decide which to buy for ourselves & which to buy for various stocking stuffers. By far and away the best part of this piece in my opinion is:
"and all I wanted to say was light them
show me that the world
smells
different
when you
ignite it"
Because when you are in love, it really does feel that way. Such a lovely, simplistic way of expressing a huge emotion. Thank you for sharing!
-
-
aww
thank you so much for your lovely comment
<333
you have made me smile
<33
-
-
a wonderful poem
your words flowed beautifully
and I loved how it ended -
-
thank you so much
<33 -
-
of course
anytime
-
-
-
that was cute. i really enjoyed it.
-
-
thank you
-
-
beautifully written
beautifully written. i love it! sooooo niceee!!!
-
-
thank you so much
-
-
awww this is really beautiful.
such strong imagery here, it kind of tears at me, in both good and bad ways.
strong, expressive. -
-
thank you so much
-
-
very nice
This shows a glimpse of your life and you seem in control. Good luck in the new year! The Shaker
-
-
thank you
and you too
-
-
This is really vivid- paints a clear picture in my mind, making me feel like I am looking in on a real life scene.
The end is lovely- this is truly excellent and I may draw a lot of inspiration from this, using this borken up form. It is very effective. Is it one you made up for yourself?
Great job!
-
-
aww thank you so much
and i really dont know
some of my older stuff
really was in a form that i created
but this
idk
i just do what i do
lol
-
-
lemons?
haha
..as long as it wasnt that hot chocolate one.. some of those candles smelled so freaking bad. it was unbelievable haha
-
-
i love the smell of lemons!!!
its amazing and i thought you did too?
i thought we had already had this conversation lol
i know!!
damn i have never smelled such bad candles
.. and i lied
it can smell like christmas...
haha
-
-
"when you start every day with a smile on your face, and I stare in your eyes instead of the sun
even though its equally blinding."
These lines are absolutely amazing !
This was very interesting :] I agree with broken-colours ! Though I'm sure I've said it plenty of times already
I love it, hon. LOVE IT :]
-
-
thank you so much honey
-
-
This is very complex and beautiful, a bit tangled but wow. Is everything you write amazing? I think so!
No fair.
"I think about the way
you frowned and made faces at my oh so extravagant way of saying hello
and
I remember that I never once looked at anything else that wasn’t you" -- that bit was really clever, by the way.
-
-
btw i missed you thought about you today lol
i know weird
hahaha -
-
Aw really? That's sweet.
And yes, everything you write is amazing! It's a fact. It should be in an encyclopedia somewhere. -
-
yes lol
haha
and man you are too sweet
thank you
-
-
-
thank you so much i am glad you liked it
and
hahah
not everything i write is amazing
haha
lol
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 31 of 31
