Pictures hanging sideways,
visions of the words.
Moments playing swiftly,
broken and obscure.
Looking at the replay,
flinching at the sounds,
momentary standby:
remorse without bounds.
Now the reel ends.
This is hell.
God was present.
All was well.
(but you can't let the lies be comforting)
No! Deceiving; lies can't save you.
Don't accept the ready escape.
This pain: all-encompassing.
This is awakening; now the time to be ashamed.
Can you see the absence here?
Burning holes in eyes uncovered.
Can you hear the echo
of the silence you discovered?
(this is freedom, seeing what's broken)
Author notes
So this is about words.
and how if you saw what you had said,
it's just so skewed. things never end up how you mean them.
Or maybe that's just me.
Anyways, I wrote this after this big thing,
where I realized that words are just a mask for everything that actually matters.
and when you stop filling the space with the pointless jokes,
and stupid things.
It's a lot easier to see what you're actually looking for.
rant finished.
thanks for the read 
Honesty is best
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Very creative and intriguing. A bit confusing at bits but I like it in general. Of course, I have one note.
It would be a lot more powerful with a title! You can't say how if you take away all of the extra words you get to the point if you can't get to the point in a title too! But otherwise, this is very interesting.
And unfamiliar. So unfortunately, I'm not quite sure how to work with it and make it better. It's different. Very well done. Just come up with a title! It'll make your point a lot easier to prove. Well done.
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Definitely interesting and I can see what you're doing. I did like the structure and the way you expressed the sentiments although at times I was somewhat confused. Regardless it's always good to read something that pushes back all boundaries and isn't about the typical subject matters we grow familiar with. Well done to you for attempting something I most certainly couldn't and thanks for sharing. Keep it up.
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A very tempting write, indeed. I liked the imagery and the metaphore and the far-spaced words.
A great read and write indeed. Thanks for sharing and keep it up.
Much love
~Noor
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i really enjoyed reading this one. it was different.it kinda opened my eyes.i never thought about that before.thanks
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Interesting form of poetry. I liked it. I'm not too sure about the spaces in your second stanza, but overall I liked the poem. And yes, I agree, words are nothing but masks for true feelings, but only sometimes.
Keep in mind alot of the time, words are very true. Nicely done.
Josh
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Very intesting and passionate. Great job with the wording and the flow was nicely quick. Good job.
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This was fantastic, it felt very intense, like you could feel it building as you read it, I love the word choice and the meter of the poem
Love the whole thing, great job
P.S. If you do read one of mine please give me feedback on memoir of a mirror =]
~Britt~
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this was really good
this was a really good poem i liked the flow andtrhe word choice was good the way it was placed was interesting and as for the title i think "memories can masqurade" i think that would fit nicely please write back to tell me what you think
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