I’ve tried for days, in vain,
To smile and pretend
That your sugar-coated words
Didn’t slice through me
Like a dull, kitchen knife.
I’m walking out quietly,
With the bitter taste of tears on my lips,
Unlike the sweetness of that morning
When I came running
Into your empty life.
Years from now, should your lover’s luke-warm kisses
Bring passionate memories of me,
Remember me as the lover
Whose heart was willing
To sacrifice her selfish desires for you.
But you
Shot me down,
And left me dying on the ground,
Wings fluttering, like a wounded bird.
Author notes
(6)Write about love. Anything at all about love, but i am picky about these because you have to make me feel the love, the loss of love, the betrayal of love, or whatever you write about it. My ex girlfriend just recently broke up with me, so if your writing about a heart-breaking love then make me feel the pain. Make me cry about it. If your not writing about heart-breaking love then make me feel the passion and the intensity of your love!
A contest entry
- I'm new to AP!!! This is my 1st contest!!! by roninwort.
3000 points, ended January 7, 43 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
so please tell me what you think???
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Great Poem.
My favorite lines are:
But you
Shot me down,
And left me dying on the ground,
Wings fluttering, like a wounded bird.
-
:: standing ovation ::
Wow. This was incredible. This contest and produced a few poems that hit me very brutally in the way they describe where I am in life right now.
Thanks for entering and best of luck in the contest.
Write on.
~*~SP~*~ -
Wonderfully Written!
I really like the way your words all flow so nicely in this poem. Wonded really seems to sum it up very nice as well as true.Remember me as the lover,Whose heart was willing, To sacrifice her selfish desires for you !Gre@t Poem ! Good Luck In This Contest ! Blessings Be to You Always, Brenda gae
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Wow
That is so sad, betrayal and love lost is some of the hardest things a human heart can go through and you portrayed it wonderfully well.
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Great job! Flowed so well, and great imagery! Bravo!
♥ Kathraina
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I love the imagery you use here.
"But you
Shot me down,
And left me dying on the ground,
Wings fluttering, like a wounded bird.'
This has to be my favorite part. A very powerful poem and its painfully beautiful. Thank you for this entry and good luck.
Ronin
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