I knew the day would come
when I’d rescue you, if only
temporarily.
So I drive, after work
New Year’s Eve
make the trek North
hoping you’ll meet me there.
It is not supposed to end this way.
Not for you or me, not
threats of running away or
suicide- not you, not me.
So I drive, after work
New Year’s Eve
make the trek and hope
...there is no hope.
A contest entry
- Driving (prewrites welcome) by Danna Hobart.
490 points, ended January 13, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
This is very rough and I haven't written anything for a long time. Critiques are welcome.
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Will work on the 4th stanza. You won't get it unless you know what's behind it... but that means it's not good enough.
Not driving quite that far. No valley trip this time.
It will be a surreal few weeks. I'll call you when everything is figured out- and yes, I'm fine, the guy's fine, and so is the kid. Everything else is out of whack though.
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Hey, everything is always out of wack. If everything was fine, that would be wacky
Okay, I look forward to hearing from you.
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I start the second half of the semester on Monday. I'm taking an honors World Lit class. Part of it is poetry deconstruction. This should be fun! (Or horribly boring!)
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Rick is against deconstructive analysis, if I remember right. I need to take a class and stimulate my brain. Can you send me a link to the school you are attending?
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Yep. You won't be able to see any of the work though. I'll email you my info if you want to log in and poke around. You'll be logged in under me though, so don't post anything.
The fun part was kinda sarcastic. I hate poetry deconstruction. I understand the reason behind it, but like all forms of writing, I don't believe the writer sits down to create a masterpiece... I don't think Twain or Beecher-Stowe sat down and thought, "This will be read by thousands, cherished by them, and will have a significant social message."
I think they wrote the story and the greatest just came. I think poetry is the same way. Pretty sure Rick is anti-deconstruction as well. Which means I'll probably send him my paper on it.
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Oh, I agree with you 250%. And I know Rick does too, because every time somoene tried to use deconstructive analysis in class, he discouraged them from it. He has a whole list of reasons why that I don't quite remember, but they made a lot of sense
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I don't get the fourth stanza.
The rest of the stanzas make sense.
I definitely would like to know the story behind this. I don't quite get the last two lines about hoping there's no hope?
I understand how big a trek it is for you, after work, and on New Year's Eve. I think others will be able to see that too.
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