she lies(cries) in the open plain,
her heart mangled,
unrepairable,
shut-down in this off season
the brutality of truth is so factually cold
breath stands frozen mid-air
as she grasps for some kind of acknowledgement
that she has not been left behind
gripping,
slipping,
invisibility is now below zero,
drowning out those fateful pleas
the face that once held all her promises
now holds the darkness
(and it is more than she can bare)
Author notes
The picture links
1.Sorrow
http://www.flickr.com/photos/cydera/390432897
In a list
A contest entry
- Pictures And Quotes Prompts by Sandygram.
1800 points, ended January 7, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Am amazing poem about sorrow. Great take on the picture. Stunning imagery throughout. A delight to read this morning. Thank you for entering our contest. Best of luck. Take care. Sandy
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this is wonderful, very emotional and intense, good luck and take care
Stephanie ♥
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Reader are taken through this gripping image with heart break and death frozen on her life to stretch forward in great pain. Feel creditable and interesting with the reading. Thanks for entering our contest and good luck
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Hey there whisper, I am so glad you entered this comp, as I have mentioned before you are my yard stick and the person I most like to write with/against.
Love this, the way the words speak of the piccture and the story told is fantastic.
Well done my friend
Simon
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wow sis this is so powerful so deep dark and sad!!! You did a truly incredible job writing and portraying this piece!!! Its truly incredible!!!!
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Honestly I wasn't a fan of stanza three, that aside the rest of the piece is so very emotive.
Really well put together. -
Final line kills! With her face hidden in her hands in the pic- 'more than she can bare.' Don't even know if you meant it that way, but I say hell yes!
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stunning
from beginning to end, I was left holding my breath
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