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Tital wave

Gentle tide has turned angry

This soft lulling wave that

once rocked and sang words of comfort

is now a beast

mouth intent on swallowing

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Arkbear gold member
    May 29
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    Mmmm....rich in visuals and thought....enough to make me ponder, twice.....nice

     

    Bear ~

  • Tota
    March 24

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    nice

    I like how you are good with words and you can push the ones mind to go to the world of imaginations to see what there is in his own mind. I love it , but may I say I love you much more?

  • boilerjim
    January 8
    Edit | Reply
    I agree completely w/robin, thanks for the thoughts and words


  • Robin Candor
    December 28, 2008

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    I believe that unless you are doing a play on words that you want to use the word Tidal. The turning of that which seemed to bring comfort into that which brings destruction is a fearful encounter. This poem delivers that in so few words. I've never been able to deliver short pieces. Ahhh, it is my fate. I have so much to say that unlike you, I must hope to not bore the reader. You certainly didn't and I respect the power of the delivery in such a short space. RC