for you and only you

It's been weeks since I felt like I belonged
I'm not sure how much longer this can go on
I feel so weak and I can't breathe
Why oh why baby would you do this to me
You knew I was praying to be the girl of your dreams
Thought you were serious when you said you wanted to marry me
I've seen you smile and I've seen you laugh
Entrusted you with my secret and guarded past
I'm the one who really loves you baby
But this waiting game is driving me crazy
I don't say forever to anyone but you
Still there's not a damn thing left for me to do
You are the only one who can make this pain go away
Why couldn't you be here to stay
Instead this knife slices open my wrists
Helping me forget with it's soft metallic kiss
I could have been happy you don't know
I sure as hell wasn't happy the day I watched you go
Is it to late to remind you how we were
The last few weeks of silence hurts
The memories are enough to kill me
I want nothing more than for you to be happy
Even if I live forever in the dark
Crying myself to sleep holding a broken heart
It's been weeks since I smiled
This emptyness inside me should drive me wild
But I am so numb and I cannot feel
Someone tell me what reality is real
You knew I was counting on you to hold me here
You swore on your life you'd hold me near
Now I sit here in my bed
Silence echoing on my head
You left a hole where my heart should be
I swear this will be the death of me
It will be all over soon
Like pouring salt into an open wound
I hear your voice in every whisper of the wind
Feel your presence in the places I go with friends
I can't go on living like this
They say that ignorance is bliss
But not knowing is killing me
I'm fading away and I can barely see
The pain is draining away my life
Aided bit by bit with this knife
I hate feeling like I am not strong
Why would you do something like this, you know leaving was wrong
I came to you with scars on my wrist
You said this would be the last time I'd feel like this
So this is my written goodbye
I couldn't say it, didn't want you to hear me cry
You say you know me its not my fault
But you don't know me at all