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The Refusal

The meadow of my mind is quenched
and flowers evilness that blossoms forth.
When liquid shadows touch my lips,
the talon crested goblet springs to life.

You have allowed the darkness to decant
and fill the open vessel of your soul.
I smell the essence of eternal lust
fermented with the bile of deceit.

Presuming you are holier than thou
and thinking you’re the germinant of hope,
was the downfall of your manliness
and now I hold your children in my cup.

Three angels came
to save your sovereign place,
but I refused surrender to your loins.
I now control the silver cup of life
and Adam must submit to motherhood.

 

 

 

Author notes

Wikipedia : Lilith is a female Mesopotamian night demon associated with wind and thought to harm children. She is a popular figure of Neo-Pagan worship. In the Book of Isaiah , Lilith ( לִילִית , Standard Hebrew Lilith ) is a kind of night-demon or animal, translated as onokentauros in the Septuagint , as lamia " witch " by Hieronymus of Cardia , and as screech owl in the King James Version of the Bible . Lilith also appears as a night demon in the Talmud and Midrash . She is often identified as the mother of all incubi and succubi . Late medieval Jewish legend portrays her as the first wife and equal of Adam . Considering Adam inferior, Lilith left the Garden of Eden of her own free will (Other stories claim Lilith refused to lie under Adam, as she considered that this was too submissive). Adam then bade three angels to find Lilith and bring her back. When Lilith refused, God punished her by commanding that she slay 100 of her children, called Lilin , each day. Lilith is also sometimes considered to be the paramour of Satan .

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1 - 10 of 10

  • MargaretG
    January 8
    Edit | Reply
    The way you have arranged your words feels like blank verse with the freedom of ending lines where appropriate - no padding here, the legend calls for strong wording and you give it. I don't know much of this story, so thank you for this. Congratulations for the silver.


  • landmark
    January 7

    Edit | Reply
    great job!! thank you for the notes also, they helped a lot. Great work on incorporating the mythology into the poem.


  • Swan song gold member
    December 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    WOW!!!!! mouth agape astounded with this excellent Free Verse poem


  • Desire gold member
    December 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Wowzers!!

    Oh My Word this is one piece which grabs and haunts but that is the Beauty of it~
    Excellent as always and Love the notes in the AC
    Woot
    The line: I hold your children in my cup
    Powerful!!
    Keep that quill dancing Precious~
    Thank You for sharing Your Talent and Spirit~
    Many blessings to You in all You do Sweet One
    Best wishes in the contest too
    with much love & light~ Desire~*~


  • Tirrell
    December 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, I do like the darkness found here, and still this is gripping in its imagery and strife.
    A powerful storyline that has been touched by a mighty quill.


  • Ken-Maverick
    December 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This would've done well in the dark write challenge,
    on an interesting topic too.
    Great job

    Ken


  • Haygood gold member
    December 27, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Very dark...

    very dfferent. Thanks for the background information. It helps. Nice write.

  • Papagallo
    December 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Another great write. You simply amaze me. So much talent in one so young. Manypowerful lines in this work, esp. #12. Now in line 10 change you're to you are. See what you think. I give you a and hope you get my applaud


  • cricketjeff gold member
    December 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Dark and foreboding tale of Lillith, the archetype of many female vampires and demons.
    Superb free verse, I think this is the first FV of yours I have seen in this genre and I love it


  • StarEyes
    December 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    They asked for amazing, and you deliver! This is fantastic Sis! What a read this one is! I love it!

    Best of luck in this contest!

    and love

    Nyetta

1 - 10 of 10