Swift and relentless, flows the river of time,
following its agenda, without reason or rhyme.
Regardless of whatever it meets on the way,
its inevitable flow, goes on day after day.
Eventually arrives, flowing into the sea,
with a temperature rise ultimately.
Ascends to add, to the clouds in the sky,
awaiting natures next step, by and by.
Comes a shower of rain which deposits below
water that joins a swift rivers flow.
Like the soul of man ultimately,
flows on through all eternity
Author notes
judmc prompt no.6
A contest entry
- WHAT I AM LOOKING FOR by Swan song.
1300 points, ended January 16, 29 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Because I'm bored and want to give away some points [NOW OPEN TO PW's] by Dovina.
750 points, ended January 3, 32 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - big bang prewrites only contest by serenity silvermoon.
900 points, ended January 5, 124 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewritten contest for group "So you want comments" by serenity silvermoon.
400 points, ended February 3, 77 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Come one come all...My third contest :) yayyss by Random Renee.
400 points, ended September 4, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrite contest - round 1 by serenity silvermoon.
929 points, ended October 12, 459 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 33 of 33
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Reading List Poem
Thank you for adding this thoughtful poem to our list. You give the reader much to ponder for time is so elusive, it flows with little restraint. Write on dear poet.
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water that joins a swift rivers flow.
great flow indeed thank you good write and good luck! -
Bandits Reading List ~
I had a feeling I've read this before and can see I did from the Bandits List in January
It is still wonderful
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I like the thoughtful words and the lovely rhyming in this poem. Time definately has a mind of its' own, it marches on despite our trying to imped its' progress. Good poem to ponder, thanks for sharing.
Dennis
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Very nice. It looks like rain today, but I love the rain.
Your last stanza is especially pretty.
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You have placed mother nature and mankind in the same boat here so to speak and it is a joyful read. Time rules all.
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funny how that works ... a wonderful cycle. rain, rivers and the sea then back to rain again. The earth would be perfect if not for mankind. sigh, Thank you for entering
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mmm very tasty...
amazing imagery, I dig it.
wonderfully penned.
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Great poem
I wanted you to tell more about how to save water but this was okay,if you want to you can edit it.Thanks for your entry though and good luck. -
Nice job! Good luck!
s.sora -
I really liked it, and I made a mistake by accidentally deleting it. Send it again?
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Great write with imagery.
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good write flowed great good job and good luck
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The Poetic Bandits
Your rhyme is flawless.
It made this piece so easy to read, a sweet write.
Similar to a beautiful wine, that goes down fine.
I loved the imagery and the emotion.
Shari
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Reading this was completely effortless for me, so thank you. You have chosen your words well and I am left feeling relaxed. Congratulations on the trophies. Cheers
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Amazing write well written
I enjoyed this great write this is my favorite stance;
"Eventually arrives, flowing into the sea,
with a temperature rise ultimately.
Ascends to add, to the clouds in the sky,
awaiting natures next step, by and by."
LISA
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Perfectly penned and an all-round almost flawless poem.
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Bandits Reading List ~
Congrats on the Trophies this has won
Such a beautiful poem, the rhyme and flow locked together lovely and I adore the first couple lines - reminds me of Pocahontas and how she felt about rivers
♥
Stay safe
~Manda
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an excellent piece you have written...the magic of the mighty river with a life all its own..the flow so swift and powerful yet gentle enough to sooth the soul...the river of life so does flow and the wisdom gained never ending...thank you kindly for sharing with me, in this river of life
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Outstanding
I enjoyed reading this poem alot. The rhyme and flow were strong throughout and I liked the images you created eventually linking the river as a strong metaphor for man's soul. Nature has her cycle and everything has its place. Best of luck in the contest.
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I feel the flow of the rhythm as I speak your lines. The waters ripple as the seconds tick both moving forward No surprises just the pleasure of reading a nicely rhymed and well crafted poem.
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very well penned
this was a great piece -
awesome
This is beautiful. I had this beautiful flowing picture in my head the entire time! only criticism is a few times I had to go back over a line to catch the rhythm, however, that could just be me and my own shortcomings
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Your poem flows as smooth as time and water
the first two lines are a very good intro and I believe we areand nature is all influenced by the tides.
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This poem is very well put together rhyme and rhythm wise. It also has nice imagery and makes one think.
If there is a knock to this poem is that many other poets have written something very similiar.
But I enjoyed this peice very much
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I appreciated the cycle of water/cycle of time
simile and thought your rhymes and rythms
well chosen. There are no wasted words.
Most enjoyable.
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What a succinct example of the water cycle. Thank you very much for entering my contest.
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A well expressed view of the progress of time, which gives it some purpose. Like time itself, your piece flows; don't know if time rhymes but your piece rhymes nicely.
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Great read!
Flows smoothly. Lovely lines about nature and simile to the soul.
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It's so true how time keeps flowing, repeating over and over, which will continue on until the days on Earth end.
thanks for your entry! -
Great flow! Bravo!
♥ Kathraina
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This is such a lovely write. I love your rhyme and imagery, especially this part-
"Comes a shower of rain which deposits below
water that joins a swift rivers flow.
Like the soul of man ultimately,
flows on through all eternity"
Thank you so much for your entry and all the best to you!
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