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snow day

 

 

 

 

temperature drops

 

snowflakes fall all around us

 

capturing each heart

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Haiku on Winter

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Malabu
    January 23

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    A haiku also centers structurally on a pause or caesura ("kire" in Japanese). By juxtaposing two elements or parts (with one of the elements spanning over two of the poem's three lines), the two parts create a spark of energy, like the gap in a spark plug. The two elements of a good haiku may seem unrelated at first glance, but if the reader lingers on them sufficiently, he or she may notice a reverberation. When you realize the connection between the two parts (sometimes called an "internal comparison"), you have a "spark" of realization, an "aha" moment. As a writer of haiku, it's your job to allow the poem to have that spark--and not to spell it out for the reader.

    although i love the backdrop it takes away from the poem
    thank you for your entry


  • Jesann gold member
    December 25, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Delightful
    I love it. !!


  • mbm
    December 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    turned all time around this for a minute ~

    wow the ending is so reasonable it raised my eyebrows, like a lady heard earlier so a myth didn't stand but her... and there was no oddness in how our spirits are insulated per se in the frigid weather by its alternate beautiful scene.

    you did such a nice gravitation of your lines into the twist.

    my daughter definitely had a taken up yard play with a snowman and daddy today,
    called Carolyn


  • Crazy-Love
    December 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh I just adore Haikus! This was a very beautiful one! Snow is one of my favorite things about this time of year.

    Crazy-Love♥


  • misticmoonlite gold member
    December 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    yes it is beautiful as flakes fall in the moment, love the background in this also good luck in his contest...Voe


  • Olivias Violin
    December 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I love the falling snow!


  • Denerica
    December 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful words for just three lines... love the background...amazing


  • hotchocolate gold member
    December 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    OH NO SNOW!!!! I like this hon you did a great job on this Haiku Good luck in the contest hon


  • redbarchettadrive gold member
    December 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Wow!

    Great haiku friend! I joined this contest too.
    I added you as a fave so I can come back and read some more of your work. I love writing haiku. Not all of them are of the perfect sort. I do have a few faves tho. I started a 2-5-5 haiku thread at a different poetry board some years ago, and I cannot forget the first 2-5-5 that flowed from my pen, it was:

    friendship
    no water required
    it sails on pure trust

    Anyway, I really liked your koo and I'll see ya around. Merry Christmas to you & yours!

1 - 9 of 9