my eyes are aching
with the sleep i was denied
from coughing all night
trying to rid myself of chest congestion
the heater stuffs me up
i go to turn it off
the cold makes me runny
i just want to shout!
An anvil is lying on my skull
as i attempt to ignore the pressure
my limbs ache when i move
or even if i don't
This winter has the upperhand
making food taste like flem
and warmth feel like hell
and cold make me sweat
damn it! damn it all..
curse mother nature
and her sick humor
I can't get comfortable,
i can't get sleep,
i can't even eat.
only able to catch a cold...
damn this frigid day!
and all the others to come.
Damn it! damn it all.
curse this winter
and the cold that pushes me into
an oblivion of sniffles
coughs
aches
and bitter
very bitter attempts
to get rid of this wake
A contest entry
- I Hate Winter! by Yemassee.
650 points, ended December 26, 2008, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
The frustration shouts out
wanting to be heard,
to share this tale of unrest.
The last line, clever, making the point!
-
These lines:
"curse mother nature
and her sick humor"
Only someone who suffers winter can understand how we humanize it, and how we then see it as a personal joke against us. Or maybe it's just me.
I was wondering how "damn" might play in this poem and I have to admit, I liked how it did. It added an intensity and a drama, not too much to be melodramatic, just enough to lend a little indignant levity...for beneath that lies truth.
The hearts on the right are a nice ironic touch, I liked that. Thanks for entering this nicely written poem!
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