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Winter Solstice

The light shrinks down to the merest ember,
The night to her greatest length extending
We're stranded here at the cold year's ending,
The freezing darkness of drear December.
Stoke up the firelight in bonfires blazing,
Driving the ghosts to the mirk of Hades
Bring out the radiant faerie ladies
Call back the sunshine in flame amazing.
This is the time when the moon is waning
Silvery bow on an ink-black backing
This is the time when the light is lacking
Time of the storm and the gray sky raining.

Oh how we long for the light's returning
Warm endless days with the sunshine burning.

Author notes

Photo #3

A contest entry

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    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • darell
    December 30, 2008

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    Enchanting!

    Oh what a illuminating poem,
    filled with wonder and enchantment.
    Your words were captivating and
    beguiling. Seizing the imagination
    for a journey into magnificents.
    Great imagery and expression


  • ChimericAntithesis
    December 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    When I read this, I couldn't really get into a rhythm.
    It seems a little irregular with the rhyme.

    Perhaps expand the imagery and morph it into free verse?


    • Keith
      December 30, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Aye, right. Are you taking the pea and ham?
      This is a sonnet, my man. That's 14 lines of iambic pentameter, rhyming, in this case
      abba, abba, abba, cc.
      That is the whole point of it's poetic existence. You morph it into anything you like, I'll leave it the way it is. Michty me, whit dae they teach the bairns they days?


  • Silent Hope7
    December 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Simply captivating!!! SO beautiful I loved this what a well written piece of art!


  • Meroza
    December 25, 2008

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    This was an interesting take on the prompt, and very originale. Well done

    best of luck


  • Nangaleema
    December 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i thought this was awesome. i enjoyed the rhyme the flow and the sentiment so aptly expressed.

    my favorite part:
    "This is the time when the moon is waning
    Silvery bow on an ink-black backing
    This is the time when the light is lacking
    Time of the storm and the gray sky raining"

    excellent write. - NANGALEEMA

  • Papagallo
    December 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Well works for me. I would get rid of "Oh" word in end of your poem. Or, seek another word for Oh.


  • Clovis6790Curious silver member
    December 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Superb plus

    Ah, 'tis a fine write. Reminds of of Earth Mother Religious beliefs. Imagery; rhythm and rhyme are just fine. Thanks for sharing.


  • izziwebs
    December 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Gorgeous so far

    Yay! Hooray for you!
    Meaning, mood, flowing meter, perfect rhyme
    This poem reads beautifully and I wouldnt change a word of the first verse. You just need to send it out to othertime(s), as you begin to do in the final couplet, for awhile and then bring it back home to the now of winter.
    Who are you stranded with? Is there some contentment in the dreariness? Or are you as cold and dark as December. How far into you has darknes extended?
    It's such a visual piece and I want to see more of the poet. This work is too beautiful to be only about the weather.


  • ea silver member
    December 22, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    That's a nice ode to the solstice

  • Judith Chandler
    December 22, 2008

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    This brings the solstice back to its basic natural level. I really enjoyed it. Like what you've done with those "ing" rhymes too.

  • Bad Bill gold member
    December 22, 2008

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    I'm impressed by this beautifully-fashioned sonnet, with its well-chosen words and powerful imagery. Excellent.

    Bill


  • chills
    December 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    silvery bow on an ink black backing was a lovely snapshot. Yes, rather tired of the dark days myself hun. x Deb

1 - 14 of 14