Blood droplets spilled upon the floor
This broken life she wants no more
She runs from her fears like mascara down her face,so full of tears
Driven insane and so full of pain
She looks around and finds no one to blame
This room in which she sits,it is so cold
There is no one to love,and no one to hold
She is a broken girl..
with broken heart,
broken hopes,
and broken dreams
Destined to be picked apart by your hateful glares and stares
Beautiful Silver songs are etched upon her pale white skin
Quieting her screams
with a crimson sin
Author notes
This poem is about a close friend of mine, nicknamed Twitch..
Please tell me what you think...
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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This is a very good write! I enjoyed it a lot. You encompassed a lot of emotion! good job
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Very nice. Who doesn't have a friend like this? Maybe if all those hurting people got together, they wouldn't hurt anymore? I don't know. Beautifully sorrowful write.
Safely hidden in the darkness,
~ The Rocker Who Lost All
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MIND BLOWING!!
oh my! Casey this is truely your best one! I think it is so deep! AMAZING!!! -
Breath takeing.
This is beautiful.
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hmmmm
twitch..the girl you told me about..hmm..interesting...
---cookie--- -
Scary...
I love love love the last stanza beyond belief. 'Beautiful Silver songs are etched upon her pale white skin
Quieting her screams
with a crimson sin' Inspired!! Very dark and deep and full of despair. This is exactly my sort of thing
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I like it. Great write. Xds-gX
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i love this poem,
the last stanza is brilliant
good write. -
She is a broken girl..
with broken heart,
broken hopes,
and broken dreams
i like the repetitvness of the word broken here it think it adds a really nice effect. the last stanza is also beautiful and very well described. great work.
Laura. -
despair
you portray the despiar with eloquance and with depth. so sad.... I remember this feelng... Please send my love to her.
RareFlower
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Thank you
thank you for your comment!..im really glad you liked it. ^_^
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Oh my goodness. I can say, out of a lot of self-mutilation poems that I have read, this is absolutely one of the best.
It is absolutely wonderful.
For being someone who comes from this, I can say that this definitely helps describe may emotions that go through one's mind.
Amazing.
I applaud you,
-Katherine
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amazing.
casey, you seriously have talent.
my favorite lines are:
'
She is a broken girl..
with broken heart,
broken hopes,
and broken dreams'
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Wow... I'm blown away. I can relate to this 100%.... I love the rhyming, it's wonderful. You express this so well.... It's a great write, keep it up.
Veg
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this is beautifully written.
it's so sad, but it is a great write.
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deadly and beautiful i like this poem the poem of an alltime cutter am i wrong?? ether way a good job that it is good work i realy liked it alot of emoshon in this and for that i am sorry great work i do wish to hear more some time
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I am posting this in a bulletin cause it's how I feel and it kinda makes me feel a little better and I'm more than likely gonna put it on my myspace. Ok luv? Perfect poem.
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Whoa. I am really glad I stumbled onto this. Its awesome. The emotion spills out, and it flows real well. The rhyming is real good for how you have set the poem out too. Its deep, and really shows how much you know about your friend, Twitch. Its a great set out, and has great verses. Keep it up!
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It's a great write and I love it. I like the emotion it sets and I love the last stanza. Keep up the good work with writing.
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This is really touching and powerful.
Destined to be picked apart by your hateful glares and stares
What a picture this write paints in the mind...
Wow.
;p
Gwen
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Moving...
This is a really moving peace.
And a lot of people can relate to this.
"Beautiful Silver songs are etched upon her pale white skin
Quieting her screams
with a crimson sin"
This is a beautiful poem with really good flow.
Keep writing.
You have a gift.
~Annie Shadows
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they have you dont they? maybe they just need to see that
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Beautiful. I love the metaphor you use. You did a great job on this. Well done...well done. Keep writing!
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