You were an illusion
like the mirage that shows light at the end of a tunnel
tempting me to start across this dark space,
but then consuming me after just a few steps forward
Or a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow,
it's beautiful colors dancing across the sky
promising more than they can deliver
In the end, giving me only more grief
a lie, neatly wrapped in sheep's clothing
cleverly disguising the death hidden beneath
living as half my prior self looking for solace
you lead me to believe you were an angel
the saving grace I'd been searching for
but you stood in front of a green screen
showing me what you thought I needed
you gained my trust and then yanked the dream,
that you had falsely built in my life out from under my feet
In a list
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
-
Sometimes we allow people into our lives because we have needs. If their intentions are for the good we continue to allow them access, if not we would do best to show them the door. Letting go is always hardest.
Your emotions share with the reader every sensation that the forlorn lover experiences.
I hope that I haven't caused pain to resurface and that you are through with these feelings. As your quote expresses; "FORGIVE...but never FORGET". That is sound advice. It leaves the possibility of recurrence to be nonexistent. Great poetry Criss.
Much Love Forever ♥
Renee
-
-
My Beautiful Renee,
I still deal with this pain. I am still learning to forgive, it's happened very slowly, but is hapepening.. every single day.. I move forward.
I love you,
Criss
-
-
returning the favor...finally...
I don't think there is much more I could say here that hasn't been already. Your words strike a chord and make my heart remember this feeling.
I know quite well.
Excellent job... you need no tips from me.
~Kristy
-
-
love sucks
-
-
Criss
The emotion in this write is incredibly powerful. Nicely written piece here. Keep it up!
Happy Holidays
Love
Janine
-
Well Penned!
Such a sad piece you have inscribed here as you look for healing in another's lies, thinking he's for real, and yet to only find out you have another dissappointment to tack on to the masses of them in this world.. Sorry to even read of a sweet soul such as yourself being hurt like this, and know the dream was always real in you, and you have alot to offer in this world.. Sometimes by being a loving soul, and trusting the maybe unknown, just makes you see that you want to believe the best in someone, and there's nothing wrong with that, and we all should live and learn to guard our hearts, but know yours is pure. Much love and light!
-Timothy aka poeticweaver~ x
-
Oh my...
Part of me would like to offer a couple of suggestions but mostly I feel that the emotional outpouring outweighs any small suggestion I may make and I feel the heartache with all of its weight. And quite honestly, when something is so personal and painful and not entered into a contest there is the complete liberty to just run with your thoughts and Amen to that.I like the title, most candy contains artificial sweetening agents and the word covering also lends itself to the cloaking. I like the colouration of the screen, he chose to screen, green was for go , green for fertile, but again an illusion for it was green for jaded. You are such a sweetheart and you have a sweet heart and though this was a heartbreaking lesson to be fooled ( and most of us have whether we admit it or not ) and that it is over /was wrong for you also means that you are totally free and along the rest of your journey you'll find who is right for you. All the stepping stones on the way, some are little steps, some are bigger, sometimes they are slippery and we slip but that's why we have such lovely, lovely shoes! Strap on your best shoes, your feel good shoes, your stilletoes and if you slip again, as you are picking yourself up you can say darn that hurt but these shoes look good on these legs and I am not standing still I'm not even walking hell, strut your stuff girl, wishing you a merry christmas and a happy, healthy, harmonic new year
-
-
Thank you for such an encouraging response. I have been in this "heartbreak state" as I like to call it for almost 2 years. The most horrible feeling is to love someone when they have stopped loving you... the second most horrible feeling is when you fight so hard to make something work and the other person walks away like they never gave a damn.
This is a pain that consumes me sometimes, but for the most part I try to stay positive.
I would love suggestions. Please feel free to give suggestions anytime. I am not an excellent poet.. I just write because it is what keeps me sane. LOL. I would love to grow and learn as a writer. The door has been opened.
You are lovely. I hope that you have a great holiday as well.
Your friend,
Criss -
-
Criss...
That is so sad, to still feel the same ache of the break for nearly two years but I empathize with the extra weight you carry within. As for my suggestions they were only tiny things like it's/its and maybe left align and make the lines tighter. I am not a great writer, I too have much to learn and hope to grow. I don't know that I could even call myself a poet, I just write rambles or postcards! It's great that allpoetry is a poetic workshop where we each of us are able to both be moved emotionally by a write and share perspectives whether that be how we related to the poem and or make a constructive suggestion. So please feel free to offer any suggestions to me aswell, as long as they are legal, moral and not physically impossible lol
All the very best
Yvette
-
-
-
Love the green screen thought, very new age indeed...
Illusions may be hard to see at first but are always reveled
through actions. It matter not how often a person says
they love you if how they treat you conflicts with that.
It's like they say, "Actions speak louder than words"...
I'm indecisive about the last line, whether it should be
life or perhaps mind, since all illusion is in reality
mind based...
Happy Holidays
Hugs...Eddy
Adding your comment:
1 - 10 of 10
