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one of those things

yeah...
it's one of those things
that i know is happening
when it's happening;
yet i am still disappointed
when it doesn't
go the way
i had
secretly
hoped it would go
anyways.
it was a moment
that threw me back.
a moment
i felt in my chest.
and yet still...
i held hope.

it's one of those things
that makes me
wonder
what i am doing to myself

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