the Raven watches
atop the barn at dawning
his minions gather
scouring bare pasture leavings
meager winter fare indeed
Author notes
picture deviant art
In a list
A contest entry
- anti-dreams by unraveled.
750 points, ended December 18, 2008, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
working
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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Wow!
Sharp and concise, so powerful! I like the image of the raven, dark and brooding.
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My humble thanks
I struggle with Haiku, tanka flows more easily for me, I value your comments thank you
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Enjoyed your fare!
You seem to have taking a liking to this form.
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tanka very much
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Excellent
Very creative and so well done. Best of luck in the contest.
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My humble thanks
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Excellent and chilling I must say Those dam birds give me the creeps lol
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ah well
it is odd,where ever i live I always have Ravens, never crows, in Celtic mythology Bran the Raven is the teacher of hidden knowledge, guess they are my teachers, and they are clowns
thanks you for reading my works
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Beautiful poem...fits the picture perfectly
Mariana
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my humble thanks
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this doesn't meet the line requirement.... but i liked it a lot
a perfect image for representation of the 'hard winter' theme. i think we all have a struggling raven inside sometimes.
thank you for entering
-cassidy
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Well done. I would suggest a change to the word "feast" as this implies abundance. Maybe something like "fare" -- there is also something more severe about that word that follows the concept of scarcity.
I like the poem. Wonderful imagery with very few words.
Garrison
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fare vs feast
thanks I like fare also.believe me a December Nova Scotia Pasture is barren indeed
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