Way back, so long ago,
Forever now, it seems,
I took your hand and led you there.
I led you to the place in my dreams.
A sunlit path and so much grass,
We could do whatever we wanted to here.
I wanted you to see it.
I wanted you to see me, my dear.
To commemorate our love,
We drew hearts in the dirt.
Our fingers, blackened,
SO in love, but they really hurt!
Our young love,
It took flight that day.
Our love was one of fairy tales,
But I knew that it would never stay.
Almost ten years now,
Since I last saw your face.
You broke my heart and left me.
I just moved to a new place.
I was going to start over,
Until I got the call.
Thought that I had forgotten about you,
Until I got that damned call.
We were just kids back then,
But I remembered you forever.
Now, I will never stop thinking about...
Ever.
I retraced my steps.
I went back to our secret place.
I drew a heart in the dirt,
And mentally pictured your sweet face.
Why did you have to do it?
Why could you have not just came back to me?
Why did you kill yourself?
Tell me, baby...
Why?
Author notes
a piece by me, H E R O E S R O X. Remove the spaces....
In a list
A contest entry
- Not So Happily Ever After (Romeo And Juilet) by HereComesTheSun.
950 points, ended February 13, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Imagery! Poems about lost Love by FaeRae.
1200 points, ended February 25, 17 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Deep emotions by Addicus.
400 points, ended April 28, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
what do you think of this?
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Some lovely imagery here, the title was mind blowing amongst some lovely words.
Thank you for taking the time to enter.
Kindest of regards
Sophie
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It always seems to go that way, that's why I try my best not to give my heart away, because I always get it broken in the end.
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Other than taking out the "but" in the third stanza, I think this piece stands on it's own. Very well done & well written.
Blessed Be,
Rachele -
I just need your Author's Notes and then I'll read & comment on this for you. If I've missed them, point them out. I can be quite a ditz.
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Okay! They're there now!
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What all did you need? I put the Mikey dog thing...lol. Well, I just now noticed. My AN is not showing up...
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wow again never saw that ending coming wow just through me back. great write the rhyming worked really well this was just a wow piece
thank you so much for entering -
Hearts in the dirt...
that lead to heartache & heartbreak!
This is painfully emotional & very relate able. Young love sadly ended by separation of miles & then a chance phone reunion only to end in tragedy! 
Very vivid write. All the best in the Contest! 
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Aw such a bittersweet write!!
I was really surprised when I got to the end, and when I read this, I thought that you wrote it well, and I can tell there was meaning and emotion behind this. You put a lot of effort, I like it very much.
This write is so beautiful but so dark, of tragedy and love lost.
Thank you for entering.
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To commemorate our love,
We drew hearts in the dirt.
Our fingers, blackened,
SO in love, but they really hurt!
I liked that part as well, I thought it was cute!
Nice write.
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Oh my a sweet beginnining to a bitter end, very expressive, very emotional...........good luck in the contest .
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