If I Could Touch You Maybe
If I could touch you maybe
Although you may not know
I'd give you all the love I have
Before you turned to go.
You don't comprehend it.
I'm unknown to you.
Surreptitiously it would
Still be just as true.
Author notes
picture vebri-rizcha-carolin in deviantart
A contest entry
- Quickie! Quickie! 10-40-1 hour by Hikari Lady.
700 points, ended December 14, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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This flows so smoothly and has very simple words yet deep meaning. I loved your last line with your rythme. Thanks for entering the contest and best of luck.
~Noor -
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Glad you liked it.
It was more your picture than the other one that inspired it.
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Us old-a** men are checkin' in, man! Well written, the conversational tone was priceless.
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Thanks.
I try to 'keep it real'. I'm more of a Service type writer. I write like I speak, and hopefully speak like I write.
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Beautiful flow, and a good read, this one. All the very best to you always
Love
Alyzeh
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Thanks.
Lots of reading, then lots of practice. As you can likely tell; simple rhyme is my favourite kind.
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I love your take on the picture and the flow. Good luck in Noor's contest and best wishes.
Keep it flowing
Much love
Ylova
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Thanks.
You know; I've heard that the most beautiful people are sometimes the loneliest because people are afraid to approach them.
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Wow! Lovely rhythmn, easy reading, radical rhyming, brilliant! Best of luck in the contest!
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Thanks.
If it hadn't been for the word limit I could have gone on
and on
and
on. -
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And I could have read on
and on
and
on!
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Well done and good luck to you
with this entry. I love the emotions
and hope in it. Thanks for sharing it!
Jeremy0826 -
Good write and imagery
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Thanks.
I try.
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