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The Angels, the Lies, and the Cries

All the angels around me
So lost in my love or my loyalty
But I feared that I was defeated
Because this battle might rage forever
It might kill me
And I need to see your face
Its a secret
I swear
Everyone knows and I never told
But they don't know his name
And our place is known by the enemy
But I know he never found me there
One look from a disturbing stranger
One push in his direction
Approval, which was never given
Before
I couldn't get away for months
After he broke my heart
And I prayed to love again
I ran, once again, to my garden to see your face
But it was the angels in front of my eyes
And I didn't know what to do, my love
Because they were all beautiful, my love
They were all beautiful like you

-Andi-

Author notes

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • VerminVomit
    March 7

    Edit | Reply
    it flows really well, it's packed with emotion, the repitition of "my love" at the end fits in perfectly and makes the whole poem better, its a great poem,
    but i dont like the topic youre writing about, i dont like it.

    thanks for entering


    • Andiness
      March 7
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for reading it, rather you liked the topic or not, thank you.

      But, and you don't have to answer if you don't want to of course, may I ask why you don't like it? Just out of curiousity, I mean.


      • VerminVomit
        March 7
        Edit | Reply
        well, i dislike anything love related and yeah

        • Andiness
          March 7
          Edit | Reply
          Ahh, well you might want to avoid many of my poems. I've had...well I don't want to say a bad experience with love since it was the most amazing thing in the world but it didn't end well. Most, if not all, of my poems are inspired by it in one way or another and none of them have happy endings


  • Samantha Marie
    February 19

    Edit | Reply
    wow this was so emotionally powerful, I loved it.
    AMAZING write.
    Thank you for entering this contest and good luck


  • Prodigious.Mirth
    January 28

    Edit | Reply
    I hate to look like I agree well I am but the last four lines were powerful. REALLY heart wrenching powerful and If I am correct about who the man that had beauty like angels is then I know how you feel, I know exactly that feeling because I have felt it to and I still do and there is nothing that could take away the feeling that you've walked upon heavens door when he even mentions your name.

    well done XD
    Bravo !!!!


    • Andiness
      January 29
      Edit | Reply
      You're correct and you know it!

      Heavens door.....yeah, that's the understatement of the century


  • ApollosMuse
    January 23
    Edit | Reply
    fabulous!!!your poems are amazing!!


  • xxSerendipityxx
    January 21

    Edit | Reply
    Great write I like the whole poem but I have to say my favorite lines are

    "But it was the angels in front of my eyes
    And I didn't know what to do, my love
    Because they were all beautiful, my love
    They were all beautiful like you"

    Keep it up !


  • Kathraina silver member
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    great piece, it flows really well

    ♥ Kathraina

1 - 11 of 11