Dr. Moreau's New Island (Fiction)

Dr. Moreau took a walk around his island one morning and said, "I'm sick to death of all you freaks, I need a vacation."

He checked out Travelocity and booked a flight to visit a friend, Old McDonald who had a farm.

"I'm resisting it, resisting it, resisting it...I can't resist it....E-I-E-I-O!"

And on that farm Dr. Moreau saw ducks, chickens, cows, pigs and much more-

It was like putting a kid in a candy store, except Moreau had scalpels, electric drills, chloroform...and Middle Eastern backers anxious for results.

Before long there were cows with webbed feet, Mousers that eeked like rats and pigs with duck tails. The good Doctor, like any obsessed craftsman, couldn't keep away from plying his trade.

Old McDonald wasn't as upset as you think, because, his old friend Moreau could cross-engineer practically anything. Mac's cows produced chocolate milk, his chickens laid cholesterol free eggs and and his tomatoes were as fat as pigs...so who cared if an occasional horse flew around on turkey wings...old Mac's production was up 225%!

Something eventually did bother the old farmer however:

One morning he awoke to find cow udders crudely stitched to his belly. Standing in the corner, with a straight razor and wearing a surgical mask, was his pet chimp Bonzo..."monkey see monkey do..."

Old McDonald shrugged his shouldered in resignation, he reasoned that this was the price of success. But he shuddered when he thought,

"How will I ever get used to that sucking feeling of the milking machine?"

Maybe Dr. Moreau could help?